How a man behaves when he wants to return. How a man behaves when he wants to return He “accidentally” appears where you are

It would seem that fatal and last words have been said for a long time, and the man who was dear has remained in the past, received the nickname "former", and now you want only one thing - so that nothing reminds of him, so that you can start building your own personal life anew, from scratch.

An no. Despite the fact that he himself made the decision to part, the man continues to call, constantly finds a reason to meet, visits your page on social networks and asks all mutual friends about what is happening to you and if you have a new boyfriend.

What is this? Awareness of one's own mistake and the desire to return? Or is it just behavior from the series: I myself am not am, and I won’t give to others? That's what we'll talk about today. As well as whether it is worth taking a step forward or is it better to change the phone number and finally leave this man in the past, like, leaving, leave.

How to understand that the ex wants to return

A man wants to be in your life if he is not just calling or showing curiosity by talking to your acquaintances. He also takes active steps, at least he shows that he is ready for them. For example, he constantly offers his help, it is important for him how your plumbing works, whether all the lights are on, whether it will be difficult for you to drag heavy bags from the store before some holiday. Just remember that if he really wants to return, then the initiative comes solely from himself, and not as a response to your request, since not only the one who wants to build relationships with her again does not refuse to help his ex-wife or girlfriend, but also someone who is just well brought up.


Another sign that the former wants to become the current one is the realization of one's own mistakes and an attempt to correct them. Anyone who tries to enter the same river a second time draws conclusions from the past and does not behave as he once did. He tries to re-win a woman, commits acts unusual for him. And regardless of whether he left himself, or it was you who sent him into retirement. Only those who are ready to change in order to be with a woman again truly want to return.

Although we must immediately make a reservation that there are some individuals who, having once abandoned a woman, and then, without arranging their personal life with someone else, believe that their desire alone is enough for the woman to accept them again. Such a man simply comes and says: here I am, love me and favor me. That is, he believes that he is such a gift that a woman will be happy only because he again paid attention to her. In this case, you need to run away from such a man, otherwise after a while he will again go on a free voyage, again nothing, or rather, he will not find anyone, he will return, and you will wait and forgive, and, accordingly, will be unhappy.

A sign that a man still wants to be with you is his desire for an open dialogue. The one who is silent, who does not voice his plans and feelings, does not yet know what he wants, or it is convenient for him to use his ex-wife (lover), for example, to satisfy his sexual needs, without promising anything in return.

And not always a man speaks about his plans and feelings directly, it can be hints and reservations. Indeed, at its core, a man is a proud beast, and it is difficult for him to immediately admit that he was once wrong. Although if he does not voice anything at all, this is a reason to be wary, this is where the "dog in the manger" syndrome may manifest itself. That is, he may not need you at all, he simply cannot bear to think that you will be with someone else.

How to help your ex get back

If you're sure you want your ex back, don't play cat and mouse with him. Be sincere and open. A man should feel that you have forgiven him (and this is very difficult, because resentment does not just go away). And since a man first of all loves with his eyes, then you should meet him every time with a smile and a dazzling appearance - well-groomed hands, beautiful clothes, elegant hair and makeup. And under no circumstances should you complain about your life. The only thing you can afford is to hint to a man that you feel bad or hard without him. But to hint.

You don’t have to do a favor to a man - like, of course, I’m offended and hurt, and in general, I get along fine without you, but if you really want to ... This behavior backfires. A man, no matter how much you want it, does not begin to feel his guilt more acutely, on the contrary, he begins to look for no longer a reason to return, but reasons why he should not do this or do not want to. And this happens due to the fact that a man subconsciously feels that you, having gained power over him, will constantly remind him that he left, and then “crawled himself”, you will play on this situation, use it for your own purposes . Of course, it would be easier for you if you could hurt him equally, but this is a dead end in a relationship, and, sooner or later, such a relationship will end again, only for good.

You can also show your readiness to accept a man back with the help of tactile contact, that is, with the help of touches. But here we must act very delicately (generally, in this problem, delicacy is the first thing). Do not obsessively try to take your ex-man by the hand or hug him by the shoulders when you pass by to put the kettle on. It is quite enough when talking sometimes to lightly touch his fingertips with his hand. It is also appropriate to hug him at a meeting (if he comes to your house) - cordially and easily, as if in passing. And withdraw immediately. This is a signal - you are glad to see him, ready to start a dialogue.
If there is a place in your house where your ex-man is most comfortable, then take him there - this way you will show him that "his territory" is still waiting for him. The exception, of course, is the bedroom itself, that is, you can put it on the sofa in the living room, even if this sofa is your sleeping place, but bringing it into a room where there is only a double bed and a wardrobe is not recommended. In the bedroom, a man’s thoughts rush not to the future, but to a specific present, that is, straight down, and this is already an invitation to sex, and not a help to a man to return. True, in a certain situation, sex can also serve as a help, but only if up to this point you have in every possible way avoided intimacy with this man.

When not to help and forgive

As mentioned above, first of all, you yourself should want to be with this person again, but if you have even the slightest doubt that you need it, then look for another man. And even more so, you need to think 33 times whether you want the return of the former, if there is already another man next to you who is trying his best to make you happy. And even if you don’t love him until you lose your pulse, there is no guarantee that, having accepted the former, you won’t regret in a week that you missed the person who didn’t betray you, for the sake of dubious pleasure again “stepping on the same rake ".

There are other situations:

If you are constantly given some promises, but they do not fulfill anything, then there is no need to justify the man by the fact that he simply has no time. This self-deception can take you too far. The one who wants to return everything will not “feed you breakfast”, but will act.
If a man calls you only when he is in a strong alcoholic intoxication, then you should not flatter yourself with the hope that: what a sober man has in his mind, then a drunkard has on his tongue. This is far from true. And not the subconscious at this moment speaks in a man, but loneliness or a desire to talk (or have sex).

If in conversations with you, the ex constantly mentions those women with whom he was after he broke up with you. A person who really wants to return will spare your feelings and, accordingly, will try to at least convince you that he was just leaving "nowhere." And even though you clearly know that this is not the case, his attempts at “white lies” are a good sign. If he continually returns in stories to his recent past, in which you were not there, but there were other women, then he regrets precisely that time, and not about his past life with you.

If a man says that he wants to return everything, that he wants to return and be with you, and in the meantime he prefers to spend time not with you, but with his friends, at work or in a sports club, that is, he does not put your interests above his own. In this case, he only cares about his own comfort, and he wants to return to you precisely because you are part of a comfortable life (clean shirts, hot food, regular sex). This is a manifestation of selfishness, and we are not talking about any love here by definition. He does not want to return to you, he does not care who will be there, just not to be lonely and unkempt.

In general, the question of the return of an ex-man is a slippery question. On the one hand, maybe fate gives you both a second chance for happiness, and if you use it, nothing will separate you. But on the other hand, according to statistics, only 1 out of 20 couples after reunification live together for more than 3 years. Therefore, it is worth accepting the former only if you yourself are ready to forget about the past, that is, do not remember past grievances, do not reproach or blame the man. Two must change. You should not think that, upon returning, a man automatically becomes your thing, falls into eternal slavery to you. And that he, feeling guilty, will put up with any of your whims. And you yourself are unlikely to be able to forgive him for a new betrayal. Therefore, a man should also understand that from now on he will have to carefully work on relationships with you. So only a joint desire to be together and work in the name of this goal will make the second attempt successful and, perhaps, bring happiness.

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Breakups are always hard and painful. Especially if this happened when the love of one of the partners has not yet passed. Most often, a woman comes to her senses for a very long time and until the last hopes that her now ex-husband will change his mind and return. So, in order not to entertain yourself with vain illusions, just read this article. It describes, point by point, how to understand that he will return and how to behave in a similar situation.

Ex-husband

It is much easier to understand the intentions of a person with whom you have lived side by side for a sufficient amount of time, because, most likely, during the time of intimacy you have already managed to study the habits, character and manner of communication of your ex-husband quite well. However, it is also common for ex-wives to see in a once beloved person something that may not actually exist. So, how to understand that the ex-husband wants to return and not be at the mercy of self-deception.

To begin with, remember that in such situations it is best to take for truth not the words, but the actions of a man. Former partners can talk for hours: both with you and with someone else who agrees to listen to him. But if a husband comes to you not out of habit, but to help, for example, screw in a light bulb or help with repairs, this indicates that he is interested in taking care of you. Not sure? Try to ask him for help yourself - if he agrees, then all is not lost. Although, perhaps he is just a well-mannered person who understands that it is difficult for you to run a household without a firm male hand. Therefore, when evaluating his behavior, take into account the number of personal initiatives to a greater extent.

Another indicator that the ex-husband still loves you is sincere remorse for his actions. And it does not matter at all for what reason the breakup occurred (of course, if you were not the initiator of the divorce), a loving man will always be able to admit he was wrong and will try with all his might to make amends for the pain caused to you. So, if he is trying to win you over again and is sincerely ready to change his behavior to suit your interests, he still loves you.

There is another way to understand whether the husband will return to the family or whether this person is just comfortable at the moment “using” you because there is no one worthy queen nearby. An open dialogue is your assistant in clarifying intentions. Just honestly and in as much detail as possible explain to the man your feelings and experiences: a man who really values ​​you will do everything he can to convince you of the sincerity of his intentions. And even if not with words and beautiful gestures, the main thing is that the actions of a man coincide with what he says.

Just a former

And what about a girl who was abandoned by her lover? How to understand if he wants to return the relationship? Yes, in general, the behavior of married and single men in these matters is not too different. However, some signs can still be distinguished as characteristic only of a young couple:

1. You can understand that an ex-boyfriend misses you by how much he is interested in you, despite the breakup. If he calls you himself or through acquaintances he is interested in how you live, what you think and asks other questions that in no way relate to the person of the guy himself - he has not forgotten you.

2. He has a lot of excuses to cross paths with you. After the breakup, you began to see him more often than you did when you were together, and these meetings take place in places that he had not even suspected before? The guy remembers that you forgot his comb / gum / toothbrush and other little things that he, as an honest person, returns to you one a day? If the answers to these questions are yes, it's easy to understand that the ex-boyfriend is attracted to you and hopes to win you back.

3. He has noticeably changed: he began to take care of himself, although he used to be afraid of a toothbrush like fire, he tried to remove vulgar jokes and abusive words that you never liked from his vocabulary. He gladly gives you cute trifles and talks about a future together and still remembers how much you wanted to go to the sea. Or has the behavior of this person changed not so dramatically, but you personally feel these changes?

Congratulations, in order to be with you, he is ready to give up what once annoyed you so much, and for a man such things are almost a marriage proposal. So you can accept it as a fact and understand that he will return - later or earlier it doesn't matter. The main thing is that you will definitely be together.

But if a guy promises and says one thing, but in reality it turns out quite differently, you can immediately turn around and leave. He can promise a lot, especially if at the moment it is beneficial for a man to be with you for some mysterious reason. But even if he instantly finds ten excuses for your innocent request for help, it’s better not to hope and not to guess whether the guy will return or not, but to send the cunning man directly to where he has already gone once.

For the guys: girls come back sometimes too

Yes, yes, if you are a guy who was dumped by your beloved and just stoically read the entire top of the article - this section is especially for you. And although it is officially considered that it is logically impossible to understand a girl, however, the female half of humanity also has its own algorithms for communicating and choosing gentlemen.

So, how to understand that a girl wants you back and at the same time remain a normal person:

1. To begin with, the question is: why do you need to know if she wants to return or not? Be a man - seek her attention and location, at worst, take advantage of many years of experience in kidnapping brides. Yes, yes, girls love strong men who know what they need. And there, neither her initial motives nor desires are already completely unimportant.

2. Well, or, if you are used to acting traditionally, just watch her behavior. A woman in love will not leave her "victim" unattended, that is, if you often cross paths with her, especially with glances, then she is watching you and you are not indifferent to her.

3. For harsh methods, jealousy will do. Walk past the former by the hand with some beauty (it can even be your sister, the main thing is that SHE does not know her) and see if her behavior has changed. If she laughs unnaturally loudly, gets nervous, or kills your companion with a look, she is not indifferent to you.

All people make mistakes. Sometimes men know how to "break wood" and offend a loved one. But over time comes remorse and the desire to fix everything. What does a man do when he wants a woman back? How does he act, what decisions does he make and why does he do it that way? In fact, men also know how to experience guilt and remorse. Simply, he does not like to express it as sincerely and honestly as women do. It is difficult for them to take off their tough guy mask and show humanity. This happens only in those cases when the guys understand that they are losing everything and are ready to make any deeds and concessions, just to return a loved one.

Photo gallery: What does a man do when he wants to return a woman?

What does a man do when he wants a woman back? In fact, every guy, as well as every person, has his own ways and his own approaches. But, if a man is really guilty, he first of all tries to ask for forgiveness. By the way, it is worth noting that young people are extremely proud and narcissistic beings. Therefore, asking for forgiveness for them is indeed a very big step. Unless, of course, this guy is sincere and not hypocritical for any reason. Such individuals will apologize - time to spit. They do not attach importance to any of their words, and all their emotions are completely false.

How to get a woman back

If you know that the guy is really remorseful, then take into account the fact that asking for forgiveness, he practically humiliates himself in front of you and kneels. And, some men cannot do this at all, even under pain of death. Such is their pride and psychology. Therefore, if you understand that the guy’s fault and resentment is not so strong, try to forgive him. But don't be too soft and forgiving. In everything you need to know the measure. If you understand that you are still hurting, or you just want him to learn a lesson, let him conquer you further. In fact, men know how to come up with ways to conquer their ladies. It's just that after the relationship becomes long and serious, they begin to forget about it, relax and make mistakes. If a guy really offended you, offended you so much that you decided to leave, then the atonement for guilt should be such that it can overshadow the pain and resentment. Each of us knows about the dreams and fantasies of loved ones. In order to return the woman he loves, a man will definitely try to realize at least some of her desires. And here he will not save either on time or on finances. When you lose the most important thing, thoughts about such trifles do not come to mind at all. Of course, if his beloved is really so important to him. And if not, then you shouldn't go back to it. In this case, you did the right thing by leaving him and you should not even think about forgiveness.

In order to win the woman they love again, men do real stupid things. Now I'm not talking about jumping from bridges and cutting veins, because such antics speak of mental abnormalities in a person. Here we are talking about those actions for which women then scold their men, touched by their romance. You can think of a thousand ways to please your beloved. And obviously no one is limited to a bouquet of roses here. Women dream of all sorts of things. Someone wants to go to London, someone just needs to get to the concert of their beloved and legendary band, and someone’s soul is warmed by the dream that her prose or poetry will still be published. If a man is guilty, truly guilty, he will spend all his savings to beg forgiveness from his beloved and do whatever she wants. In such cases, the guys really act like crazy. They are driven by the fear that a loved one will leave, leave forever and it will be completely impossible to change something. That is why the guys go on all sorts of adventures, connect all their friends and acquaintances, trying to rectify the situation. Of course, you can’t jump above your head, and everyone has their own financial capabilities. But, women understand this, and evaluate it based on how much the guy has and what he is ready to spend on his forgiveness. Unfortunately, words and feelings alone are often hard to regain trust. And it's not about mercantile spirit. Simply, through such actions, which are often not easy at all, the guys show their emotions and desire to do everything, if only the girl would believe and forgive. If her millionaire gives a lady a car of the latest model, she will not pay any attention to it. But if an ordinary, average girl, her boyfriend, who begs for forgiveness, takes a car on credit, she will certainly appreciate such an act. You need to understand that it is not about the amounts and not about money, as in a separate category. Here everything merges together and shows how great a man’s desire is to move mountains just to return his loved one. It is in this, and only in this, that true love is expressed.

Women always feel a lie, even when they are trying to deceive themselves and put the guy in the best light in front of family, friends and herself. That is why girls always understand how true the actions of her man are and what, in reality, they are worth. Sometimes, in order to return a woman, weeks are enough, and sometimes it takes months. Pain and anger can really become simply unbearable. But, nevertheless, almost always a woman forgives when she sees that the guy repents, changes and is really ready to do everything possible and impossible for her.

What does a man do when he wants a woman back? He is no longer silent about his feelings and forgets about pride. A young man does not think about his image, about what opinion his friends will have and whether he will fall in their eyes. Sometimes, a man needs to lose in order to understand how much he loves and cherishes a person. That is why he atones for his guilt by all means and expresses those feelings that he has been hiding until now. Some men really need to arrange such life lessons so that they finally begin to understand what exactly needs to be cherished in this life. And then, the guy will do everything to make the girl believe in his love again.

Breakups are tough enough to deal with, but coping with the mixed feelings you get when you meet or hear from your ex can be even harder.

There are many different paths you and your ex can take after you break up: you can remain friends (not recommended if you want your ex back), become bitter enemies, civilized acquaintances, or even reunite again, but just like sexual partners.

By the way, depending on how your relationship ended, the idea of ​​getting back together may also cross your ex's mind.

How to behave and not look stupid if you want to return your man? Does he want this?

If you think your ex wants love back, check it out by reading these 10 tell-tale signs that a reunion is possible:

1. You can't find out anything about his personal life.

If your ex still loves you, then there's a chance he'll avoid dating someone else... or at least not let you know. Why doesn't your ex want you to know about his personal life? Maybe because he is afraid of hurting your feelings, or he is worried that the news of this may become an impetus that will also return you to the dating site.

Simply put, if your ex is trying to keep his personal life a secret, then it may be because he subconsciously wants you back.

2. He does things that clearly show that he misses being apart.

If your ex, updating his status on social networks, writes phrases such as “my life is so empty”, or “I want her to be here” (in principle, he does everything that directly says that he wants you back), then I think he wants you back.

Keep an eye on whether he leaves reminders of your relationship on social media pages. Most likely, he hopes that you will see them, miss him, and also want to return him back.

3. He calls for no reason

If your ex wants to win you back, he will call more often than a normal friend. In fact, sometimes he can even call if he has nothing important. If you notice that your ex is coming up with excuses to talk to you on the phone, then most likely he misses you and wants to win you back.

4. He finds ways to still be there for you.

If your ex still loves you, he will continue to act in a very warm or flirtatious manner. If your ex is addressing you in an affectionate tone or whispering something in your ear, then this is a huge sign that he wants you back. You may also find that your ex has become very touchy, or tries to hug you voluntarily or involuntarily.

5. He loves to reminisce about the past.

People who have a hard time after a breakup always talk about their feelings with their former partners. If your ex is constantly calling you to talk about your past relationship, to understand what went wrong, or to remind you how much he loved you, then he is obviously trying to re-ignite the spark and win you back.

6. He tells how much he has changed

If your ex is calling to apologize for the mistakes he made in the relationship, it may be because he is trying to clear something up between you or in his mind. If, however, your ex calls to talk about how things could have been different, how he has changed, or to discuss issues from the past, then it is probably because he wants to give your relationship another chance.

7. He is always jealous

Depending on the degree of your ex's jealousy, this may be unpleasant, or, on the contrary, your heart may warm if you see that he acts in this way. For example, if your ex gets irritated when he sees you flirting with someone is one thing, but if he gets mad when you just talk to another person, then it's time to tell your "ex" to back off.

In any case, this is a sign that he is not indifferent, and probably wants you back.

8. He "accidentally" appears where you are

If you run into your ex everywhere you go, or see him where he has never been before, and it happens almost every day, then your ex may be following your whereabouts. In this case, you just need to ask what he is doing here, and from his answer you will understand everything you need to know.

If it is obvious that he is only here for you, then it is easy to guess that the former is trying to return your life together.

9. He calls you drunk

Drunk drunk your "ex" suddenly called you? It can be funny if only one innocent time happens. But if your ex calls you every time alcohol is in his stomach, then it could be a sign that he still has you on his mind and wants you back.

It is true that alcohol relaxes and removes many psychological inhibitions, but if your ex is calling to confess eternal love, desire for sex, or anger towards you, then it is likely that this is not just drunken nonsense. If he pours his heart out to you, that's a pretty clear sign that he wants you back.

10. He directly says "I miss you"

It means a lot. If your ex opens up to you and says he misses you - then he really wants you back! If your ex talks about how he misses you or how he wants to spend time together, or if he expresses how fondly he thinks about your relationship, it might be time to start wondering if you want your love back.

These signs are not as difficult to understand as, for example, rocket science? Everything is elementary: if there are more than half of them, then he definitely wants to return you!

If you have questions about how to get your ex back, or would like some of my personalized advice, then click here and book my consultation.

It is almost impossible to build harmonious relationships without quarrels and partings, and therefore many couples have to endure short-term separations. "What are the signs that he will return?" - a frequent question among women who do not want to interrupt a harmonious relationship.

The first signs of the return of the man

Signs that a man will return are very different. Usually, if a representative of the stronger sex wants to resurrect a relationship, he begins to get in touch with a woman. At first it looks unobtrusive and is an elementary correspondence, but gradually the lover begins to look for a meeting, and all this ends with a new round of romance.

Another sign that a man wants to resurrect a relationship is his friendship with his partner. If the guy is not sure that the romance should be ended completely and irrevocably, he tries to maintain a normal relationship with his passion. Moreover, former lovers communicate very often, a man consults with his girlfriend on various issues and is always ready to help. Sometimes such friendly communication does not result in anything else, but almost always it means that the man is not ready to end the love affair.

Sometimes men try to arouse jealousy and possessive interest on the part of their partner. That is why they are trying to appear in front of an ex-girlfriend with a new lover. Also, a man can deliberately spread a rumor about his new romance through mutual friends. Thus, with the help of elementary jealousy, a person will try to awaken feelings in his partner, resurrecting her love.

Many girls pay attention to the fact that before the resurrection of a relationship, a lover often begins to appear in common companies. The guy is literally looking for a meeting, he wants to contact the girl as much as possible. As a result, they cross paths all the time at work or at mutual friends' parties. Sooner or later, such regular contacts will lead to the fact that people will begin to communicate better, building bridges for continuing relationships. Here everything will depend on the girl, because despite the fact that the stronger sex almost always takes the first step, men always expect responses from their partner, and without them they will not initiate further contact.

Very often, men who want to secretly resurrect a relationship begin to behave aggressively. In particular, they are rude to former lovers, trying to attract their attention and resurrect at least some feelings in their hearts.

How to behave if a man wants to return to a relationship?

Of course, one desire of the stronger sex is not enough to resurrect feelings, because here the consent of both parties is necessary. The girl herself should think about whether she wants the resurrection of the relationship, and whether she is embarrassed by the fact that the man can again disappear from her life.

If his return is received with joy, then proceed with caution. Firstly, you should not completely reject contacts with a man, but you should not communicate with him too much either. The representative of the stronger sex must understand that the girl has other interests and plans. Secondly, it is worth behaving with your lover a little coldly and detached. In this case, an incredible desire will awaken in a man to win a partner, to become part of her life again. Thirdly, the girl should also play a little on jealousy, perhaps appear in a common company with another man.

It is very important here that the representative of the stronger sex understands that a vacant place next to a woman will not always be free. As soon as he realizes that his beloved can be happy with someone else, he will definitely try to resurrect the relationship. There is no way to do without a serious heart-to-heart conversation. If people have already parted several times, then the woman should discuss her claims, try to emphasize that this resurrection of the relationship will be final.

In the first stages after the next resurrection of a relationship, a man will behave almost perfectly, flooding his partner with gifts and making amends. During this period, a woman should do everything possible to emphasize the integrity and harmony of the relationship. When the second half understands how important this relationship is for him, the desire to disappear and destroy feelings will no longer arise. Of course, it is impossible to glue broken relationships forever, but sometimes the feelings of partners are so strong that people simply cannot leave.

If the relationship broke up due to treason and assault, then it is not worth restoring them. The fact is that after reconciliation, the partners will have to forget about all the insults, and it is impossible to get rid of the memories of such a betrayal.

Sometimes, after a breakup, a man most of all dreams of resurrecting a relationship, but he cannot admit it to himself. A wise woman will always notice changes in the behavior of a former lover, indicating his feelings.

Good day to all.
In general, this is: I am 25, she is 21. She has a son and our joint daughter. We have not lived together since January and a month later we have a divorce, the documents have already been submitted.
Let me tell you first:
We were together for almost 4 years, 2 years of marriage. The last six months have been full of fights. Due to the fact that the daughter does not go to kindergarten, both 2/2 worked. I work for 2 days, then she works for 2 days, so we didn’t go anywhere together, and quarrels accumulated and accumulated. At first everything was fine with us. I am a good cook and taught her how to cook. Initially, she couldn’t even fry eggs at all and was a bad housewife. Then she seemed to start trying, but for the last half a year she was generally lazy and I very often cursed at her because I had to call her from work, wake her up so that she would cook breakfast for the children, because she will never do it herself. That's how we lived ... But at one point we had a very strong abuse. For the whole month we only swore, and now, after saying very loud words to each other, I raised my hand to her. I don't even know what came over me. Like it wasn't me. I am very ashamed of this, but all the same, this act has already been done. The wife often did not give a damn about household chores. Coming home from work (I work until night) - I had to persuade her to heat up the food, but she still walked and warmed up with a disgruntled look, and the mood from this fell and it always was. Sometimes there were moments when everything was fine with us, but still something happened later. She also lies very often. On trifles, but lying. I have never gone to the left, I am 100% sure of her fidelity. She is far from being from a prosperous family, and I defended her from her relatives, who tried in every possible way to humiliate her. In general, her relatives did not love me, and my wife said that she loved my mother more than her own.
In general, here she tells me that she will live separately. We had already parted ways several times before, and I was rather cold about it. I knew that she would return and, in general, there was no analysis of what was happening. Everything remained as it is. And then she left and when she came for her daughters, I also approached her and said: “Let's put up already,” to which she answered me that she didn’t miss me at all and so on. That he doesn't think of me at all. It's been 4 days since she left. Okay ... During this time, she never once asked how her daughter was doing. I took the phone from her and went to the social. a network where she wrote to a guy from work who was obviously glued to her and she also asked in response how he was doing, how did he sleep? Because of what, rabies just started in me, I just didn’t understand how my daughter went by the wayside? I pulled myself together and just went to training. So I started to go crazy. Wild attacks of aggression, then in tears he tried to return it, then the swing began. I called her constantly, wrote constantly, to which she constantly answered me that I would leave her behind, that she was disgusted with me, that she did not consider me a member of her family. It was like this for more than a month, until I slowed down and fell behind her ... Then, nevertheless, our communication improved, we began to communicate, she came to the child on her weekends, if the joint fell out and walked together a couple of times. But then I began to notice that she began to change a lot. She became much prettier, began to take care of herself. New hairstyle, lost weight. And the attitude towards the child has also changed ... If we have a joint day off (right now I work every other day, and she is mostly 2/1, but sometimes weekends coincide), then on this day off I will definitely be with the child, and she spends this a day with friends in a cafe or cinema. Those. thoughts of taking the child somewhere do not visit her. I wrote to her, tried to awaken the mother in her, forced meetings with my daughters myself. I just don't understand her. I, being at work, wait faster for the next day to be with my child again. And she sees my daughter much less often and does not seem to be bored ...
In general, when we went to court to file for divorce, I told her that after that our communication ends. Now we only talk about our daughter. And then she called me, wrote when she was bored or went somewhere. She replied that she was used to me and did not want to stop communicating, but I told her that I needed to get rid of my emotional dependence on her and she understood me. So we didn’t communicate at all for several days, but I miss her madly. I did not give my daughter to her, because her son spends more time with her retarded relatives and I don't want that to happen to my daughter either. At first she was threatened by the guardianship authorities, and then she voluntarily agreed to leave my daughter to me. In general, when she was just collecting things, we immediately discussed the fact that my daughter was staying with me. She didn't mind. Well, for several days we didn’t communicate at all, but then the child soon had a DR and started a dialogue on this topic. Then I wrote to her that for some time I would not take the child to her, that I myself would sit at home with my daughters, because. I broke my toe and was on sick leave. She agreed. Today I went to the hospital for a dressing (they put stitches, an open fracture and did not put a cast), and she was not far from the hospital. She called, asked how she broke it, so I told her and I say that she’s in the hospital right now, come on. She came. I called a taxi, drove her to the house, went to my house myself. On the way, they calmly talked and joked. She invited me to go to the park on Sunday with the children, to which I agreed. When she got out of the taxi, she said: "Bye. Call me." I came home, but did not call. She called me herself and said: "I forgot to show you the dress," well, in the social. network threw off the photo. I complimented her on her appearance, told her that her new hairstyle suits her. She asked what I was doing, I said that my daughter was going to bake pancakes. She said, "I want pancakes too." Well, I said that tomorrow I'll go to the dressing and I can bring her to work. Well, we talked a little more. There was also a moment when her friend offered to move in with me for a couple of weeks and see how everything would be with us, to which my wife agreed, and then abruptly changed her mind. It was at that moment when she didn't even want to talk to me at all.
I visited a psychologist to recover. I completely analyzed our life together, my behavior, changed my outlook on life and I know what I want. For some reason, I think that although my wife was a bad housewife, I have enough strength to change myself, which is what I am doing now, and change her. Maybe stupid and naive ... I lost a lot of weight on my nerves, abandoned training, at first I drank, not for long. Now I go to sports. Gym, I'll be back in martial arts soon.
So, dear ones, is there a chance that she will return or does she just want to remain friends and want to live a free life? If the first - what should I do now? Friendship has been restored. Should I get her again? How to understand that she will be ready to give me another chance?

Ex wife wants to come back

Get your wife back

Ex wife wants to come back

Women are extremely amazing creatures who often do such illogical things that we men can only come in shock. For this reason, we should not be surprised if the ex-wife, who left you earlier with tantrums and scandals, expresses a desire to cling under your strong shoulder again.

And although this situation seems rather ambiguous, we, nevertheless, will suggest the main line of thought that you should follow when making your final decision.

Remember that at such moments, men most often begin to rush from side to side, dooming not only a possible reunion with an ex-wife to failure.

If you were the initiator of the separation from your ex-wife

This case has almost one of the easiest solutions. If you were the initiator of the break with her, then you must be clearly aware and remember the reasons that caused the breakup. You will only need to make sure that these reasons are still there, which means that you should not return to a broken trough. And if everything is not so bad, then again the initiative comes from you.

As a rule, if a man already has a relationship that he cherishes, then he should not return to the one that he previously abandoned himself. Of course, there are small thoughts about the past and a desire to “remember youth”, but the current relationship is still of decisive importance.

If a man is without a second half, then after a couple of meetings with his ex, he feels whether there is a spark or not. And then he himself makes the final decision.

Those. the whole initiative comes from you, what decision you make, this will be the right one! In this situation, you have no room for error.

If the ex-wife was the initiator of the breakup

But this is a real trap, since you have to make a choice in a situation where you do not know all the terms of the transaction. Your wife can talk to you about old feelings and true love, and, for example, she herself can cool down after her last romance, or she needs your money, or she just got bored of loneliness and wanted to ruin your life. Of course, there may be a sincere desire to restore relations with you, but even it appears after she has been battered by life without you. In general, everything is very speculative.

Situation "Constriction". The ex-wife gets in touch with you and offers you to restore the relationship, motivating everything with pure love. Since such a presentation never works, it adds here the desire to give your children a happy childhood and upbringing. Those. she starts to pressure you through your children.

On the other hand, you have either already married another woman, or are close to it, so your new woman is not indifferent to you. This is where the difficult question turns out: “And who to choose in this situation?”

A simple rule applies here: "You should never deal with dubious partners when there are safe options." Therefore, if you are now happy in your new relationship, then you have no moral right to destroy your happiness for the sake of a dubious opportunity to make peace with your ex-wife. But if in the current relationship you are unhappy, then any of your decisions will be correct.

Situation "Lonely breadwinner". When an ex-wife proposes to restore a relationship, and you are not currently in a relationship, then your decision should be careful, and your actions should be slow.

Yes, you don’t have a soulmate now to easily refuse your ex, and the opportunity to be with your ex again cannot but rejoice you. But you must clearly answer yourself one question: “For what purpose is she doing this? Why does she want to restore the relationship right now?

As a rule, you really come across such women who, after some time, realize that their decisions were hasty, and they really do not want to live without you. But there are those who simply solve some of their problems with the help of you, or need some help.

Even if she has a need and such a step is a necessary measure, this generally does not deny your victory over her, but it would still be useful to know the truth. Therefore, before making a final decision, be a little lazy cat, which seems to be cuddling, but not given into hands.

After a maximum of a month of such a relationship with your ex-wife, you will be able to see the true reason. And this will help you make the right decision. If you refuse your ex-wife's proposal, then this will also be the right decision.

Women's weapons

To get a positive response from you, many women resort to quite effective, but still straightforward manipulations. You should know them so as not to lose the ability to think rationally.

Think about children. This is one of the most powerful manipulations when a woman puts not your feelings and understanding at the forefront, but children. Naturally, any man will be hurt by such a statement of the question, because no one wants to be an irresponsible parent. However, you must understand that first of all you decide the issue of personal happiness, and only then should you think about children. And you know, sometimes life without a father for children is even better than life in a family where parents argue and swear with each other day after day. Therefore, first decide for yourself, then think about the children. This is the only way you can do better for them.

Manipulation of the past. The more time passes, the more bad memories are forgotten and good ones remain. This is a common practice when a person protects himself from negative memories. Therefore, women like to remind a man of the past (good past). Then the man looks back and realizes that their relationship was wonderful, everything was fine, and he is such a fool that he missed such a woman. And then he gets into the clutches of his ex.

To avoid such a situation, you need to look at the current state of affairs, and not admire your past. Then your decisions will be more appropriate.