Cheating whores, "offended", mercantile ones have one or two idiots in love with them in the friend zone "in reserve" - ​​but I never have anyone. Every woman, girl can tell a story on the topic "Oh, how he was in love with me!" - I've never had that.
At the same time, I know how to love, faithful, money is not the main thing for me. Not beautiful, but not ugly either. I heard about myself that I am very pretty and smart. Well-groomed, long hair, heels, dresses. That is, it is clearly not in appearance. I saw much more ugly ones and with a bunch of fans!

Infuriates. Infuriates! It just kills. When we sit in a company with friends, in a cafe or somewhere, they always send flowers to someone, invite them to dance. Me - never.
If you, dear men, did not look at "vibes", "mankost" and other stupidity, but assessed the essence of a person, you would be much happier in marriage! There would be no stories about a wife who never visited her husband with a broken leg in the hospital (that's how it is possible!), about betrayal and so on. I would never cheat on my husband, for me it is below the plinth.

But his wife is not me, but she. And it was about her that he dreamed of, he fell in love with her, and not me. Looked after, probably jealous. Gave flowers. He did all sorts of romantic silly things.
Her. Loved. And he would have walked past me without even noticing! Every year, bitterness accumulates and I find myself rejoicing in such stories where a man suffered from such a wife. Although I'm not evil at all, to be honest!

Now I'm closed in myself and I don't want anything anymore. One joy is to watch other people's families fall apart and then these wives suffer - former happy brides, who were preferred to me. Fortunately, there are plenty of such cases around.
There are, of course, their hobbies, work. For information: I have many friends and just friends, I easily get along with people.

There are no male friends. In general, I am sure that friendship between a man and a woman is a veiled interest. I am not interested in men. If only for once, but I don’t need this “time”, I need relationships. Whether friendly, loving - any relationship is based on mutual interest, warmth and support. Just like that and nothing else! I heard opinions like "don't be touchy", but before my eyes there are a lot of examples when a girl is far from touchy, but there is still no relationship.
Where am I wrong, tell me, men? I won’t reveal my name, I won’t give contacts - I’m ashamed.
Just look around more often: in addition to these fatal ones of yours, there are other girls who immediately liked you. A little less bright, but you chat! Come, communication after all does not oblige you to anything! Maybe your dream of faithful and reliable will come true.

I answer, what.)
And I warn you right away that you will need a lot of courage to read this.
But I consider it necessary to write, because I think there are still people with similar problems, and perhaps my answer will help them look at themselves from the outside. Yes, it won't bother you either. Therefore, I will speak honestly about the impression.

* * * * *
Here Lizka yesterday read "Discuss Me", and made me, as it seemed to her, a rational proposal: they say, Katya, you need to do this rubric a little differently. Let people send you pictures, and to them, about themselves, literally two lines, it will be cooler.
No, I answer, you can post the most beautiful pictures, fix them with Photoshop, in the end. And from the pictures, the impression of a person can be completely false.
And the text almost never deceives. When a person writes about himself, he reveals himself without noticing it, the text is an expression of nature.
A person himself sometimes does not understand how much he remains "naked" in the text.

You know, they say "Freud's slip", but I think it's high time to introduce the term "Kat's slip" - this is when a person sometimes thinks that he wrote all the best things about himself, in the brightest colors, but ...

"Here I am writing, and such anger soars!" (With)

* * * * *
If you sent me your photos, with one postscript "I'm not lucky - and that's it" - what would I see on them?
Oh, yes, maybe there would be a pretty pretty girl, "well-groomed, long hair, heels, dresses." I would probably look and think: wow, what strange men - they don’t pay attention to such a wonderful girl, what else do they need? I would even sympathize.
But I don't have a photo and I have to judge you by the text, which, as I said, often leaves a person naked.
And now, without heels and dresses, a completely unsightly picture appears to me.

And I see that you ... how to say it ... perceive the world too problematic.
And the feeling from you is not at all what you think.
Well, for example, you sincerely think that "I know how to love," but it's you who write the words a couple of lines above: “Sluts, cheating, offended, mercenary have one or two idiots in love with them.”
So after that, you could write me a sheet of text about how well you know how to love, but I will not believe a single word.
No-e-dee-no-moo!

I often talk about bells: look at how a person treats others, and don’t have the illusion for a second that he will treat you differently. Will not be. There is simply no other algorithm in his picture of the world.
It is impossible to say "all bastards and bastards" and at the same time love someone alone. (That is, it is possible, but ... such love will be sick and always limited by time and circumstances: while everything is fine - love, as soon as something went wrong - beware.)

Therefore, I do not believe that you "know how to love." No. You can not. What you don't have is love.
Unrealized female - is. Envy - full. Malice - you can draw baskets.
But love, the very element that attracts other people, is not in you.
And it's repulsive.

The person himself determines which side to stay on: on the light or dark. As you decide - so it will be, how you see the world - then you will be surrounded.
And yet you are dark, evil and heavy. And, I suppose, in real life, a lot of fonit from you.
And since you have barricaded yourself on your dark side, why be surprised that nothing sticks and men avoid you? It is not enough to declare your qualities in words, you need to radiate the same feeling.
In the meantime, for example, I perfectly understand men who bypass you on the tenth road. I would also bypass. The attitude to life and people is perfectly readable, believe me.

There is a good anecdote.
“A man sits and whines: his wife is a bitch, the children are bastards, the boss is a bastard, the salary is shit ...
And behind him stands an angel and thinks: hmmm, what strange desires a man has, but okay, since he wants to, he must fulfill ... "

So at the moment your personal angel is exactly fulfilling your order. And nothing else.
The world around is a mirror. And it reflects only what is in ourselves.
If I sit down and start saying: "Oh, I'm unhappy, everything is bad with me, everything around is creatures" - nothing good will appear in my life, and I will be unhappy until the end of my days. And only reptiles and bastards will surround me.

Well, you got it already, right?

* * * * *
...and here I smoothly move on to how to fix it.
First you need to stop complaining about life and start learning to love.
Not an abstract man who will still appear there and pay attention to you (as long as you radiate anger and envy, he will not appear), but people in general.
Yes, yes, and those same "whores" - too. Especially "whores"! And "idiots" - along with them.
Yes, but what do you want ;)

If even easier - you need to kill pride. Because pride is the snake that poisons your life.
And don't confuse it with pride, pride has nothing to do with it.
Pride is dignity. Evil and envious people, by definition, cannot have dignity.

Nobody likes arrogant and arrogant people. And yes, they are avoided.
That's how you are now - men.
Because you invisibly oppose the world to yourself - you are all so beautiful, like high-moral and like highly spiritual, and around - one dirt.
Well, what do you want, from the dirt? Here you are sitting alone in your pure, pure turret. And life goes on around.
Which is all "below the plinth" for you.
...but oh how I want to dive. Just so no one can see.

So this life, with all its jokes and imperfect people, you have to learn to love.
Take yourself by the scruff of the neck whenever you want to stigmatize another "whore", which, by the way, is such only in your still evil imagination.
Kicking yourself whenever the thought arises in your head to lower someone or envy.

And not "ahh, idiot, he invited this whore to the dance, not me, damn it!" , this "empty" is always reflected on the face.
But "wow, another couple has developed, how happy I am for them, how beautiful!". Because after the thought “they are beautiful”, you will inevitably smile, and a smile always makes a person beautiful.
You should not rejoice at other people's failures, but, on the contrary, consciously look for happy couples, look at them and rejoice for them. This changes the angle of view: If people are doing well, then so will I.
And try sincerely, and not through gritted teeth, and because Katya advised. At first it will be difficult, but then, you see, you will like it.)
Yes, after a couple of months of such training, you will look different, the feeling of you will change!

And yes, men, of course, are led to vibes.
Only these vibes are not at all the same as many women think. It seems to women that "fluidity" creates a sexy dress, plump lips, heels and a look "oh what a female I am." Only lightness and ordinary, human kindness should be attached to the look.
This is the strongest fluid.
Men can be stacked with goodwill alone. I've been doing this all my life.

* * * * *
Oh, and by the way, here you are addressing men:
If you, dear men, did not look at "vibes", "mankost" and other nonsense, but assessed the essence of a person ...

Well, firstly, catch a look at any person on the street and immediately decide: I will meet with this, and then live!
And what? Can not? You don't know him yet? Well, that's it.
Since they should have serious views on you, if you don’t give a chance to get to know yourself better?

And secondly, I personally didn’t understand at all how - well, how ?! - a potential man-who-will-be-nearby should appreciate your essence, if you are ready to bite off your hand to anyone who comes up to you: "And not for whether by this he came up to me, bitch, ?! ".
And a magnifying glass on him, a magnifying glass! Like an insect, unworthy even to crawl at your feet.

Yes, kanesh behind this, do not even doubt it!
Yes, you are wearing heels with dresses for the same - to attract a man.
And, I hesitate to ask, why? ;)
If you need a loved one - well, get yourself a girlfriend, go to libraries with her, have long intimate conversations, learn from each other a deep inner world.
No? Girlfriend doesn't fit? What? Do you need a man?

Well, a man will always be interested in a woman in the first place as a sexual object.
And whoever is not interested is gay and definitely does not suit you.
I'm not telling you to jump into bed with every first one right away, just ... take the magnifying glass away! ;)
You can also refuse in different ways. It is also possible that he will not get tired of admiring you later. So in this regard, you should even learn from "sluts who have one or two idiots in love in the friend zone" (c);)

By the way, their life develops, unlike yours;)
Because there is a lightness that you don't have.

*** This, by the way, is the problem of many touchy princesses in general, they apparently took the fairy tale about the princess in the tower too seriously in childhood: here she sat, so beautiful, in a dress and with long hair in her tower, and waited.
And the prince himself found such a person, he got up and married. And about This not a word there.
And then these princesses wait half their lives for the prince to appear, throw himself at his feet, and somehow without it, otherwise it's dirty.

So that's the fairy tale.
Well, yes, you can hit with a heel for the rest of your life “but I want it like in a fairy tale!”, But ... this is not at all constructive.

Threat. A! And get off those heels! Buy ballet flats, right?
Well, or sneakers. ;)
________

© Ekaterina Bezymyannaya

We react painfully to rejection, whether it be friendships, romantic relationships, or communication with colleagues. Once such a reaction was necessary for survival. When we lived in tribes, being rejected and driven out of the community was almost equal to death. Therefore, if someone rejects us, there is such a strong chemical reaction in the brain that it causes physical pain.

After that, we go through several stages. At first . It seems to us that we have upset the other person in some way. Then we experience humiliation and shame, we feel our own weakness. We're trying to win back that person's goodwill. “It’s not even because we want to like him,” explains psychotherapist Sean Grover, “it’s just that we don’t like feeling that someone doesn’t like us.” In the end, we feel like a failure.

These sensations are unpleasant, but completely normal. The main thing is not to dwell on them and move on.

Don't blame yourself for everything

Because of the openly expressed dislike of others, many begin. But do not forget: people's actions are usually explained by their own problems and experiences. It's not about you personally and not about the other person, but about both of you.

It’s just that this particular person at this particular moment of life is incompatible with you.

In addition, the location of the other person is largely related to the benefits you bring to him, even if unconsciously. “It shows up in animals, too,” said Jennifer Verdolin, an animal behavior researcher at Duke University. "They prefer to spend time with individuals who are similar to them in status, personality, or genetic ties."

If you have nothing in common that would be valuable to both parties, you will be rejected. It's almost inevitable.

Analyze your behavior

Do not blame yourself for the fact that someone did not like you. However, if this happens all the time, try to take an objective look at your behavior.

Ask them to explain the reason why you were rejected. For example, you may have been told that you show off a lot or are self-centered. Consider if there is some truth in this. Analyze your behavior. If you really do this and it is unpleasant for other people, .

Just don't overdo it. Of course, some of your habits can annoy others. But often it simply reflects the person's fears, prejudices, or unpleasant memories.

Make new friends little by little

Once in a new circle of people, we feel lonely. For example, at a new job or after moving to another city. In such situations, the relationship of the rest has already developed - it is easy to feel like an outsider.

Move into the new environment gradually. For example, invite one of your colleagues to have lunch together. But don't try to join the group right away. Contact the one who is most friendly.

Not everyone is ready to immediately accept you with open arms. Focus on those who are willing to step forward.

Spend more time with those who appreciate you

Surely you have at least a few people who you can rely on in difficult times. Chat with them more often. It will boost your self-confidence and bring back your self-confidence.

Strengthen relationships with people who appreciate you. This is more beneficial than worrying about those who rejected you.

And remember that the best way to make a real friendship is to be sincere. Don't wait for everyone to come to you. This attitude will not attract others to you at all.

Send the haters away

At least mentally. Sometimes you just need to accept that someone is against you. “It's okay if you have an enemy,” says Sean Grover. “If people are jealous of you, don’t pay attention to it.”

Don't intentionally turn others against you. But if someone does not like you and this feeling is mutual, then do not worry. You don't have to try to appease him at all.

Good day!
I have very low self-esteem. It comes to the fact that I'm trying all the time to find someone who would like me, and not to like a person. I became normal about sexual crimes, thinking that no one would even want to rape me because I'm ugly. Such thoughts did not come out of nowhere. Because at my age (21) I did not have a relationship, not even a hint of sympathy for me, and I fell in love millions of times, and each time I suffered in debt. My social circle is very narrow and consists of only girls, I don’t have boyfriends, I don’t know how to communicate with them, there are no men in the house, and at school I was very shy.
I really want love, but even acquaintances who could make me a couple are not even in mind. They don’t get to know me on the streets, unless they are drunk or in the summer (because my figure is not bad ... I would not mind for an intimate relationship). If I go with my friends, they only get to know them, which lowers my self-esteem even more. It so happened that I don’t choose my friends based on their appearance and most of them are beautiful, although there is one that, it seems to me, loses against my background (height, weight, hair, clothes) therefore, against its background, I win and can come up to me, but all the same, those who fit better would not fit .. drunk look, or 20 years older.
My beautiful girlfriends don’t even have to strain to go somewhere or do something special, they are in great demand everywhere. At the institute, on the way to the institute, in a store, theater .. everywhere, but this is not about me. they are looking for, although they give the impression of beauties, they are actually modest and shy. Probably the fact that they are not looking for anyone and attracts men, because most likely it is written on me: “Well, at least someone, well, come on .. I will be glad to anyone.”
I even tried to even get acquainted on the Internet, everything was not successful either, I’m ashamed to post a photo (I never take pictures ... from the age of 15 ... it’s a shame to look at the photo), only the one in which I don’t look like myself, so after 3 meetings self-esteem also fell even lower, after that no one called and stopped writing.
Of course, you shouldn’t look so ardently for a soul mate, but I lack male attention so much that without it I feel empty, uninteresting, no need, no. I never had a father, men in the house and I really miss it. And then, today's youth suffers in the absence of a guy at the age of 13, and I start dating at 16, and at 21 I didn’t even have a normal date, kisses, I’m even ashamed to talk about it, so none of my friends know, I have to lie to everyone that I had a lot of boyfriends. And if I say that there is no one at the moment, everyone is very surprised ... they would be even more surprised to know that there has never been anyone.
I wouldn’t worry so much about the lack of relationships, 21 is not 51, but still I have a feeling that no one needs me and is not interesting. Although talking anonymously, many say that I am smart and interesting, but when meeting with me they turn away. And I understand that the main thing is appearance, well, not the main thing, but a significant criterion, and there’s no way without it. And I have big problems with this. I do everything I can, and I paint, and I dress normally, but I still feel like a nonentity due to lack of attention, well, what's the point in all this, if everyone still considers me ugly.

Cheating whores, "offended", mercantile ones have one or two idiots in love with them in the friend zone "in reserve" - ​​but I never have anyone. Every woman, girl can tell a story on the topic "Oh, how he was in love with me!" - I've never had that.
At the same time, I know how to love, faithful, money is not the main thing for me. Not beautiful, but not ugly either. I heard about myself that I am very pretty and smart. Well-groomed, long hair, heels, dresses. That is, it is clearly not in appearance. I saw much more ugly ones and with a bunch of fans!

Infuriates. Infuriates! It just kills. When we sit in a company with friends, in a cafe or somewhere, they always send flowers to someone, invite them to dance. Me - never.
If you, dear men, did not look at "vibes", "mankost" and other stupidity, but assessed the essence of a person, you would be much happier in marriage! There would be no stories about a wife who never visited her husband with a broken leg in the hospital (that's how it is possible!), about betrayal and so on. I would never cheat on my husband, for me it is below the plinth.

But his wife is not me, but she. And it was about her that he dreamed of, he fell in love with her, and not me. Looked after, probably jealous. Gave flowers. He did all sorts of romantic silly things.
Her. Loved. And he would have walked past me without even noticing! Every year, bitterness accumulates and I find myself rejoicing in such stories where a man suffered from such a wife. Although I'm not evil at all, to be honest!

Now I'm closed in myself and I don't want anything anymore. One joy is to watch other people's families fall apart and then these wives suffer - former happy brides, who were preferred to me. Fortunately, there are plenty of such cases around.
There are, of course, their hobbies, work. For information: I have many friends and just friends, I easily get along with people.

There are no male friends. In general, I am sure that friendship between a man and a woman is a veiled interest. I am not interested in men. If only for once, but I don’t need this “time”, I need relationships. Whether friendly, loving - any relationship is based on mutual interest, warmth and support. Just like that and nothing more! I heard opinions like "don't be touchy", but before my eyes there are a lot of examples when a girl is far from touchy, but there is still no relationship.
Where am I wrong, tell me, men? I won’t reveal my name, I won’t give contacts - I’m ashamed.
Just look around more often: in addition to these fatal ones of yours, there are other girls who immediately liked you. A little less bright, but you chat! Come, communication after all does not oblige you to anything! Maybe your dream of faithful and reliable will come true.

I answer, what.)
And I warn you right away that you will need a lot of courage to read this.
But I consider it necessary to write, because I think there are still people with similar problems, and perhaps my answer will help them look at themselves from the outside. Yes, it won't bother you either. Therefore, I will speak honestly about the impression.

* * * * *
Here Lizka yesterday read "Discuss Me", and made me, as it seemed to her, a rational proposal: they say, Katya, you need to do this rubric a little differently. Let people send you pictures, and to them, about themselves, literally two lines, it will be cooler.
No, I answer, you can post the most beautiful pictures, fix them with Photoshop, in the end. And from the pictures, the impression of a person can be completely false.
And the text almost never deceives. When a person writes about himself, he reveals himself without noticing it, the text is an expression of nature.
A person himself sometimes does not understand how much he remains "naked" in the text.

You know, they say "Freud's slip", but I think it's high time to introduce the term "Kat's slip" - this is when a person sometimes thinks that he wrote all the best things about himself, in the brightest colors, but ...

"Here I am writing, and such anger soars!" (With)

* * * * *
If you sent me your photos, with one postscript "I'm not lucky - and that's it" - what would I see on them?
Oh, yes, maybe there would be a pretty pretty girl, "well-groomed, long hair, heels, dresses." I would probably look and think: wow, what strange men - they don’t pay attention to such a wonderful girl, what else do they need? I would even sympathize.
But I don't have a photo and I have to judge you by the text, which, as I said, often leaves a person naked.
And now, without heels and dresses, a completely unsightly picture appears to me.

And I see that you ... how to say it ... perceive the world too problematic.
And the feeling from you is not at all what you think.
Well, for example, you sincerely think that "I know how to love," but it's you who write the words a couple of lines above: “Sluts, cheating, offended, mercenary have one or two idiots in love with them.”
So after that, you could write me a sheet of text about how well you know how to love, but I will not believe a single word.
No-e-dee-no-moo!

I often talk about bells: look at how a person treats others, and don’t have the illusion for a second that he will treat you differently. Will not be. There is simply no other algorithm in his picture of the world.
It is impossible to say "all bastards and bastards" and at the same time love someone alone. (That is, it is possible, but ... such love will be sick and always limited by time and circumstances: while everything is fine - love, as soon as something went wrong - beware.)

Therefore, I do not believe that you "know how to love." No. You can not. What you don't have is love.
Unrealized female - is. Envy - full. Malice - you can draw baskets.
But love, the very element that attracts other people, is not in you.
And it's repulsive.

The person himself determines which side to stay on: on the light or dark. As you decide - so it will be, how you see the world - then you will be surrounded.
And yet you are dark, evil and heavy. And, I suppose, in real life, a lot of fonit from you.
And since you have barricaded yourself on your dark side, why be surprised that nothing sticks and men avoid you? It is not enough to declare your qualities in words, you need to radiate the same feeling.
In the meantime, for example, I perfectly understand men who bypass you on the tenth road. I would also bypass. The attitude to life and people is perfectly readable, believe me.

There is a good anecdote.
“A man sits and whines: his wife is a bitch, the children are bastards, the boss is a bastard, the salary is shit ...
And behind him stands an angel and thinks: hmmm, what strange desires a man has, but okay, since he wants to, he must fulfill ... "

So at the moment your personal angel is exactly fulfilling your order. And nothing else.
The world around is a mirror. And it reflects only what is in ourselves.
If I sit down and start saying: "Oh, I'm unhappy, everything is bad with me, everything around is creatures" - nothing good will appear in my life, and I will be unhappy until the end of my days. And only reptiles and bastards will surround me.

Well, you got it already, right?

* * * * *
...and here I smoothly move on to how to fix it.
First you need to stop complaining about life and start learning to love.
Not an abstract man who will still appear there and pay attention to you (as long as you radiate anger and envy, he will not appear), but people in general.
Yes, yes, and those same "whores" - too. Especially "whores"! And "idiots" - along with them.
Yes, but what do you want ;)

If even easier - you need to kill pride. Because pride is the snake that poisons your life.
And don't confuse it with pride, pride has nothing to do with it.
Pride is dignity. Evil and envious people, by definition, cannot have dignity.

Nobody likes arrogant and arrogant people. And yes, they are avoided.
That's how you are now - men.
Because you invisibly oppose the world to yourself - you are all so beautiful, like high-moral and like highly spiritual, and around - one dirt.
Well, what do you want, from the dirt? Here you are sitting alone in your pure, pure turret. And life goes on around.
Which is all "below the plinth" for you.
...but oh how I want to dive. Just so no one can see.

So this life, with all its jokes and imperfect people, you have to learn to love.
Take yourself by the scruff of the neck whenever you want to stigmatize another "whore", which, by the way, is such only in your still evil imagination.
Kicking yourself whenever the thought arises in your head to lower someone or envy.

And not "ahh, idiot, he invited this whore to the dance, not me, damn it!" , this "empty" is always reflected on the face.
But "wow, another couple has developed, how happy I am for them, how beautiful!". Because after the thought “they are beautiful”, you will inevitably smile, and a smile always makes a person beautiful.
You should not rejoice at other people's failures, but, on the contrary, consciously look for happy couples, look at them and rejoice for them. This changes the angle of view: If people are doing well, then so will I.
And try sincerely, and not through gritted teeth, and because Katya advised. At first it will be difficult, but then, you see, you will like it.)
Yes, after a couple of months of such training, you will look different, the feeling of you will change!

And yes, men, of course, are led to vibes.
Only these vibes are not at all the same as many women think. It seems to women that "fluidity" creates a sexy dress, plump lips, heels and a look "oh what a female I am." Only lightness and ordinary, human kindness should be attached to the look.
This is the strongest fluid.
Men can be stacked with goodwill alone. I've been doing this all my life.

* * * * *
Oh, and by the way, here you are addressing men:
If you, dear men, did not look at "vibes", "mankost" and other nonsense, but assessed the essence of a person ...

Well, firstly, catch a look at any person on the street and immediately decide: I will meet with this, and then live!
And what? Can not? You don't know him yet? Well, that's it.
Since they should have serious views on you, if you don’t give a chance to get to know yourself better?

And secondly, I personally didn’t understand at all how - well, how ?! - a potential man-who-will-be-nearby should appreciate your essence, if you are ready to bite off your hand to anyone who comes up to you: "And not for whether by this he came up to me, bitch, ?! ".
And a magnifying glass on him, a magnifying glass! Like an insect, unworthy even to crawl at your feet.

Yes, kanesh behind this, do not even doubt it!
Yes, you are wearing heels with dresses for the same - to attract a man.
And, I hesitate to ask, why? ;)
If you need a loved one - well, get yourself a girlfriend, go to libraries with her, have long intimate conversations, learn from each other a deep inner world.
No? Girlfriend doesn't fit? What? Do you need a man?

Well, a man will always be interested in a woman in the first place as a sexual object.
And whoever is not interested is gay and definitely does not suit you.
I'm not telling you to jump into bed with every first one right away, just ... take the magnifying glass away! ;)
You can also refuse in different ways. It is also possible that he will not get tired of admiring you later. So in this regard, you should even learn from "sluts who have one or two idiots in love in the friend zone" (c);)

By the way, their life develops, unlike yours;)
Because there is a lightness that you don't have.

*** This, by the way, is the problem of many touchy princesses in general, they apparently took the fairy tale about the princess in the tower too seriously in childhood: here she sat, so beautiful, in a dress and with long hair in her tower, and waited.
And the prince himself found such a person, he got up and married. And about This not a word there.
And then these princesses wait half their lives for the prince to appear, throw himself at his feet, and somehow without it, otherwise it's dirty.

So that's the fairy tale.
Well, yes, you can hit with a heel for the rest of your life “but I want it like in a fairy tale!”, But ... this is not at all constructive.

Threat. A! And get off those heels! Buy ballet flats, right?
Well, or sneakers. ;)
________

© Ekaterina Bezymyannaya

“For as long as I can remember, no one has ever liked me, at first at school I felt that boys didn’t like me, then at the institute I wasn’t successful with guys, why is that? I’m not ugly, I dress, of course, not in the latest fashion, but not bad, and I can hold a conversation, what’s the matter? Do you also have similar thoughts? Then you need to urgently do something, otherwise you won’t be able to sit alone all your life for long. Maybe then immediately to the monastery, huh? Doesn't that desire arise? Then we stop torturing ourselves with questions like “Why don’t guys like me?” and “Which girls do guys not like and which ones do they adore?” and let's get started! The foundation on which a girl's popularity with the opposite sex is based is her self-confidence. But how to achieve it, now we will understand.

Do you think that only girls with regular facial features and an ideal figure are successful with men, and are you sure that no one likes fat girls? First, what is the definition of "thick"? Chubby, chubby, chubby, only this way and nothing else. And in general, all men are different, someone needs a model girl, and someone is crazy about soft and cozy women. The main thing is to profitably present your merits. And if you, as they say, have everything with you, then you should not hide beauty under baggy things. But clothes aren't everything. Imagine any recognized beauty, with unwashed hair, messy hair, no makeup and broken nails. Horror, right? So why can't you find half an hour for a manicure and are postponing a visit to the hairdresser? Just be careful with makeup - tons of "plaster" will make you vulgar, not attractive. The key to beauty is well-groomed lips, expressive (correctly underlined) eyes and a healthy (and not black-brown from a solarium) complexion. And most importantly, smile. A smile makes many faces so attractive that men cannot look away, and a drop of benevolence has never harmed anyone.

What impression do you think a girl who stoops, does not look into her eyes when talking, and walks like a kitten with broken paws, makes? The most is pity, and we do not need such an effect at all. Therefore, we urgently straighten up (you can even rehearse a walk at home with a book on your head). Yes, and it’s good to work on general grace - stretching exercises and dancing will help with this.

The same with the look - we train, we develop such that a girl confident in her own attractiveness looks out of the mirror. And having acquired such a look and smoothness of movements, we do not hesitate to put it into practice. The main thing is not to confuse femininity with mannerisms and arrogance.

And, of course, we learn to talk in such a way as to be interesting to the interlocutor. We do not act with sharp criticism, especially at the first meeting, we show interest - we do not prevent the guy from talking about himself, etc.

It's not even so much about emancipation, but about girls who misunderstand the meaning of the word. Independence, the presence of one's own opinion and the ability to defend it, thanks to erudition and education - all these are the benefits of emancipation, which should not be abandoned. But copying the male manner of communication is not at all necessary. If a girl who behaves like a man does not like a guy, then there is nothing surprising in this. Guys simply do not perceive such individuals as individuals with whom one can build romantic relationships, The maximum that can be hoped for in such a situation is friendship. Do you think that letting a girl go ahead, helping to carry heavy bags is not at all the responsibility of a man, and in each such case you prefer to handle it yourself? In the end, guys just need to feel their masculinity, which a smart girl will gladly do.

What kind of girls do guys like, it’s impossible to give an exact answer - everyone has different tastes, but the main thing is that it should be natural. Feel free to always be yourself, and then the question, "Why don't guys like me?" will no longer be relevant.