Content
1. Analyze it...
2. Self-flagellation is natural, but wrong.
3. Polarities of consciousness, or What is going on in our head?
4. The science of forgetting: how does our memory work?
5. Universal balm for the wounds of past years
6. Achieving a goal is not enough - you need to be able to fix it

Analyze it...

Torment, regardless of its source, is a purely individual matter. Let it be stereotyped, but only the “drowning one” himself can help a person drowning in the days he has lived through. Of course, things will go much faster with the support of a specialist who will quickly establish the cause of the blues and direct the patient's thoughts in the right direction. But if a psychoanalyst is not for you, you will have to forget past memories by working through their milestones on your own.
Self-analysis becomes the main tool in the fight against experienced stress - after all, in order to cope with the problem, you first need to clearly outline it. Yes, if a person is gnawing at some moment or even a whole period of the past, the scope of searches will narrow. But the spiritual panacea does not lie on the surface, and discovering it by accident is a truly incredible task. Thinking about the situation endlessly is not an option; it is necessary to analyze, having a specific vector of information processing.

Self-flagellation is natural, but wrong

The classic "wound" that does not heal over time is destroyed love. 95% of people who are looking for a way not to remember the past are trying to drown out the raging feelings for the once beloved. Of course, there are also reasons of a different nature: bonded work, stress, illness or even the death of a friend. But they are all fundamentally one, and this root is memory.
To get rid of memories, just stop feeding them. Yes, a sad person wants to listen to sad music, savor stories about unhappy love and discuss them with friends. Yes, self-flagellation during the peak period is a pleasure for most people. But this is a direct path to self-destruction, such is the human perception.

Polarities of consciousness, or What is going on in our head?

Our thinking is arranged in such a way as to keep the worldview as stable as possible. Subconsciously, everyone is looking around for elements that resonate as much as possible with the current emotional state. If you get depressed, you will “stumble” on something that will strengthen it - dreary music, sad movies, poems about broken hearts, etc. And how can you forget the past, if with each "session" of such subconscious stabilization you plunge into a pool of memories?
The subconscious mind does not care whether it does bad things to its owner or good - it is basically devoid of these concepts, and simply works according to the existing algorithm. You can put up with this or fight fruitlessly, but it’s better to use it to your advantage. It is not difficult to achieve the goal - it is enough to realize that emotions are inside, and external factors do not affect a person. Without his consent...
So, if you look for ways to eliminate "I feel bad", the consciousness will "catch" on the negative of the wording. To get rid of the past, you need to aim for the future. The subconscious has no concept of denial, so you need to beat a wedge with a wedge. Surround yourself as much as possible with what is opposite to the oppressive state - attitudes for the future - and in the first days you will see the result. But in working on how to forget past relationships, this stage is only the starting one; the real work is ahead.

The science of forgetting: how does our memory work?

Human memory, even with the current development of science, is considered a phenomenon, that is, an inexplicable phenomenon. But inexplicability is not such a significant hindrance. The first "electrologists" like Faraday, Gauss and Ampere, not knowing what electricity is, actually created the basis of modern life, without breaking through to the origins of the forces that conquered.
Also, other scientists, investigating the phenomena of memory, agreed that it is arranged like ... a PC hard drive. Some phenomena that create a specific neural combination once may not leave traces at all, and disappear instantly - this is a "cache", instant memory. Some memories that require infrequent but quick access - like songs and poems by heart - are "flash drives". Well, if information is needed all the time, it will be written "on the hard drive" - ​​in long-term memory.
But how does this help get rid of memories of past relationships? Very simple! Memory is technically infinite, but the paths to information are limited. They can be compared to a multi-channel wire - each is connected to a specific area, and passes a strictly limited flow of information. Other data is sent to the "archive" to save resources. The brighter the emotional experiences, and the more often the phenomenon was repeated, the more securely the “wire” is fixed.

Universal balm for the wounds of past years

The limitation of the human body for those experiencing grief is not a disadvantage, but a blessing. To let go of something, it is enough just to switch the "wire" to another area. The memories of the negative will not go anywhere - technically, but they will still disappear from life, as if you wrote down information from the hard drive on a CD and hid it far in the pantry.
To achieve this, act in a similar way - fix the "channels" of access to information obtained with new experience. So, to leave behind the troubles of the past days, you need to follow simple recommendations:

Burn bridges. How to forget the past life, if everything leads to it again and again? Remove from the environment anything that evokes memories of the time or the person who hurt you. Throw away the teddy bear, “that very” shirt, souvenirs from trips and the like, or better yet, give it to the poor. Delete memorable photos, and burn printed ones with romantic letters and cute “souvenirs” like a scented herbarium. Change home and work, finally. Get rid of the temptation at the very opportunity to indulge in the suffering masochism that destroys you from the inside.
Learn new things. “Clog” the channels with fresh neural combinations, leaving no room for yesterday's negativity. Engage in previously unknown - the brain will switch from the blues of past grievances to a novelty. Take a painting or pottery course, play hockey or fly a glider, skydive or travel.
Go in for sports. The universal "cure" for depression is athletics. Running and swimming are the best options, and after 30 kilometers of cross-country on a bike, depression will get tired of chasing you. The main thing - without fanaticism; muscle overload can stimulate depression, and therefore you should not focus on the “rocking chair”.
Communicate. Consciousness is arranged in such a way that an individual outside the "flock" tends to stasis - spiritual "conservation", which completely inhibits the exit from a depressed state. Communicate. But! Without the usual framework and routine; contact strangers, discover new people. The best solution would be to engage in a hobby that involves communication - theater, oratory, and the "ether" will be filled with positive.
Learn. Study is a panacea for mental wounds. Here - new people, and communication, and unknown emotions, and flows of information ... If you have a broken heart - go to university or sign up for courses on mastering a new profession. This will not only improve the emotional background, giving the opportunity to live on, but also, perhaps, reveal a talent that can radically change life. And, of course, a new profession is a plus in a purely pragmatic sense, as a source of additional income.

Achieving a goal is not enough - you need to be able to fix it

All advice is good, if not crossed out with unforgivable stupidity. If you are still wondering how to forget past relationships and start new ones, you should not rush. You run the risk of simply transferring the image of the old person to the new one, and therefore you will take a “double blow”. Wait for the "healing" of the memory - this will happen quickly if you follow the instructions.
The right method of distraction will greatly affect your life, perhaps it will turn it upside down. You will become a different person, and stop living in the past, because with rapture and appetite for life you will plunge into the present. These truisms are the best (and only) way to get out of trouble without harming your health and leave your old life behind you.

Reading time: 2 min

How to forget a guy? In the current age of Internet addiction, you can easily find thousands of links on the resources of the world wide web containing advice on the topic: “how can a girl forget a guy?”. Turning over a pile of girly youth magazines, you can also find some useful recommendations. However, in most cases, following the recommendations and following the advice will only help you get distracted, but is unlikely to contribute to forgetting your loved one. For the quick and painless elimination of his image from memory, more active actions on the part of the young ladies and a positively directed attitude will be required.

In addition, it will not be superfluous to draw up a step-by-step strategy for erasing a guy from thoughts and hearts. Also, it is worth trying to understand that there are no irreplaceable males, that there are millions of guys around, and the girl, who is tormented in search of answers to the burning question: “how to forget her beloved guy”, is alone at home. After all, if a loved one did not have enough time or opportunities to appreciate the former chosen one, then this should become exclusively his problem. And the representative of the female part of the population is recommended to stop being sad, put a smile on a pretty face, make eyes, powder your nose, tint your lips and go to decorate the world, dressed in an elegant modest dress and stilettos. And in the process of such a “decoration”, it will not be superfluous to “shoot” with your eyes in search of a new gentleman, who, of course, will not replace the ex-boyfriend, but is ideal for distracting from sorrowful thoughts and raising your spirits.

How to forget the guy you love

It is difficult to forget a person who was not just a passerby in the life of a girl, but left a deep mark. It's hard not to remember the guy whom the young lady loved for a long time and very much, and remembering him, it's hard not to succumb to destructive emotions. The first months after a breakup, most girls think that their life is over and there will be no more joy in it. However, such thoughts are far from reality. And in a maximum of a year, the girl who previously did not know how to live on will meet every dawn with a happy smile if she finds the strength in herself to look at from a different position. Naturally, no one assures that it will be easy. You will have to endure all the pain, despair, sleepless nights, and in the mornings - eyes swollen from sobs.

“I want to forget my ex-boyfriend” - abandoned girls often ask these thoughts. Following the recommendations below, going through an unpleasant period will be easier, calmer, more joyful and less painful.

To forget the guy you love very much, you need to start acting, instead of lying on your favorite couch, feeling sorry for yourself and scolding him for being so ungrateful. The faster we move to an active struggle against despair and pessimism, the faster harmony will reign in the soul. Therefore, you need to stop feeling sorry for yourself and move on to life from scratch.

Changing your habits can help you forget the guy you love. If a girl who has set foot on the road to “recovery” is used to sleeping until noon, then you need to learn how to get up at least a couple of hours earlier, you need to buy groceries in another supermarket, and in the room you need to change the situation or revive the interior. You can get to work or college by a different route, or even replace travel in a stuffy and uncomfortable transport by walking. You should also at least slightly change the way you dress or completely modify the style. In general, what is allowed is what corresponds to the slogan: “To do everything in a new way, in a completely different way than before!”

To forget the guy you love very much, you should decompose your life into two stages - before the end of the relationship and after the break. At the same time, the stage after should become brighter, more promising, joyful and full of interesting events.

Changing life beyond recognition will lead to the fact that all past memories will fade, become faded, not worth attention, and soon completely forgotten.

So, if life is started anew, then such a landmark decision needs to be celebrated by going to a disco or other place of entertainment where you can dance and have fun.

The disco is an excellent means of bringing new vivid emotions into one's own life, and often even new pleasant acquaintances with the opposite sex. Deafening music, movements to the beat, laughter, relaxed atmosphere, the interest of the stronger half - all of the above together easily negates the bad mood caused by a depressive state. Therefore, psychologists often compare going to a disco club with long-acting anti-stress therapy.

It is possible that you won’t be able to immediately join the night life and feel all the joy of the party, you don’t have to despair and run away from the club in search of a quiet place where no one will interfere with feeling sorry for yourself. You need to hold out for the first three hours, after which the fun itself will find the sad one.

It is not recommended to neglect dates, even if little time has passed since the breakup of the relationship. After all, the main goal of the strategy called: "how to forget the ex-boyfriend you love" is a distraction from pressing sad thoughts and the reign of harmony in the soul. Of course, an unfamiliar boy is unlikely to cope with the reign of happiness and peace in the soul of a girl at the first meeting, but he can definitely distract from unhappy thoughts.

You should not compare the young man who called for a romantic rendezvous with his ex. It is better to try to overcome yourself in order to provide at least a tiny chance to a new man. Going on dates will help you understand that the romance that was in a past relationship can happen again. At the same time, the new story may have a completely different ending. The main thing is not to be afraid and not to program in advance possible new relationships for a dramatic end. You should not be afraid of new meetings, acquaintances, because they bring diversity, pleasure and to existence. A woman without male admiration simply withers like flowers without watering. And men are usually generous with compliments when they want to make a favorable impression.

What to do if you can't forget a guy? Regular visits to the gym will not be superfluous in this case. After all, sport contributes to an increase in the level of endorphins in the bloodstream, which automatically leads to a complacent state, cheerfulness and a good mood. In addition, physical activity will relieve emotional stress, which ladies often experience after the end of a relationship. With the help of systematic balanced sports exercises, three problems can be solved at once. The first two are described above, and the third is to keep the body in good shape, improve health, tighten problem areas and drop extra pounds, if any. If financial condition and time resources allow, it is recommended to diversify strength training, muscle stretching exercises (stretching) and dancing.

How to forget the guy who dumped? You can try yourself in the role of a housewife. This method is suitable for those women who are not yet ready to leave their home, their fortress that protects from adversity. It is better to start with a general cleaning. While the cleaning of the place in the head will last, there will be no thoughts about the former. In addition, a house sparkling with cleanliness will please the eyes of all its inhabitants. It should be clear right away. General cleaning is not a banal washing of floors and erasing dust from surfaces, it is scraping old fat from the hood and stove, cleaning tiles in the kitchen, in the toilet and bathroom, scrubbing windows and countertops to a shine, washing curtains, washing blinds, etc. . The list of necessary household chores can be endless. If you clean with thorough care, then there will be no time to be sad for at least a week. And upon completion of the general cleaning, the girl will definitely be drawn to the disco to break away.

If the role of a housewife categorically does not fit into the lifestyle, then it will be perfectly replaced by the role of a shopaholic. In this case, you can either visit all the shops in the city, or surf the Internet resources, there is no difference. The main thing is to get maximum pleasure and joy from your own actions. You can attract a close friend to walks in shops or sites.

It is also recommended to remove memorabilia from sight, reminiscent of a past connection. Otherwise, every time your eyes stumble upon them, your heart will hurt from pain, which will prevent you from forgetting your former partner as soon as possible.

Most girls do not tolerate a breakup with a loved one quite well. And the modern age of IT technology, unfortunately, also exacerbates the process of experiencing a gap. After all, what does psychology say, answering the question: "how to forget the ex-boyfriend you love." And she says the following - removing the object of love from sight for a while, you can permanently get rid of attachment. Today, it is almost impossible to remove an ex-boyfriend from the field of view due to the large-scale distribution among all walks of life and the huge popularity of social networks, in which most of the youth are registered. Even if the former young man is not on social networks, there are absolutely his friends or relatives there, who, willy-nilly, will constantly remind you of your loved one.

Psychologist's advice on how to quickly forget the guy you love is aimed at analyzing your own attitude towards your former chosen one. First you need to understand whether the girl really experienced love or these feelings - self-deception, easy love or banal affection.

Psychologists are sure that in the presence of true love, people do not suffer. Suffering causes self-doubt, attitude towards a partner as personal property, affected, fear of loneliness. To get rid of these negative emotions, you need to make every effort. The next step is to relive the romantic love story. For this purpose, you need to select two paper sheets. On one, describe a “love story”, list all the happy moments that happened to the couple during the relationship, and then list the suffering experienced by the girl when the relationship was coming to an end. At the bottom of the sheet, you should write a phrase of the following type: “all this is in the past!”. The sheet with the novel must be thrown away, having previously been torn into small pieces. After that, you should go to the second sheet. It is necessary to describe the feelings felt by the girl in the process of writing the novel. You also need to list the qualities that are not enough to feel more confident, strong and attractive. Here you should try to be as frank with yourself as possible, you must list all the shortcomings, weaknesses and positive features without hiding. In addition, experts in the field of psychology recommend that if a girl has a bad mood after waking up, if she is haunted by obsessive thoughts about a breakup, you need to take a cool shower to relieve negativity.

It also perfectly distracts from memories of past relationships by dipping into study or work with your head. In the state of experiencing a gap, there is a small plus - this state contributes to the achievement of many successes. In case of casual meetings with the former at the institute or at work, it is necessary to direct all efforts to give him a minimum of attention. You should also smile sincerely at him. Let the guy think that his ex without him is not hysterical, but happy and self-sufficient. Now it's his turn to think that he made a huge mistake by parting with his once beloved. As time passes, the girl will be surprised that she could have suffered because of this man who has a lot of flaws before.

The psychologist's advice "how to forget a guy" is aimed at understanding that parting with a man is not the end of life. No need to walk around with a sour face, causing compassionate looks from relatives and friends. After all, pity humiliates. A break with a young man should be perceived as an ideal reason for. Each lived day, an event in life brings experience, a bit of wisdom and a little bit of knowledge that accumulate and turn their owner into a balanced, intellectually developed person. Therefore, the former man must also be taken as an experience.

Operational advice on how a girl can forget a guy. Immediately after the breakup, girls are allowed to cry for exactly one day. After all, the daughters of Eve are refined and emotional beings who relieve tension and stressful conditions through tears. To facilitate the "breeding of dampness", you can re-read love correspondence, gentle SMS, listen to songs that evoke memories, review presentations or joint photos. Tears will cleanse the girl's heart of negativity.

The next day, it is necessary to send all the memories that yesterday provoked sobs into the trash (expensive gifts can not be thrown away, but limited to their temporary exile out of sight).

The third day must be dedicated to yourself. You can arrange an impromptu SPA salon at home by filling a bath with hot water and adding sea salt and seven drops of your favorite or mood-enhancing aromatic oils (for example, rosemary oil) to it. Having climbed into the bath, you can conduct a visualization session, imagining how all the negativity, all sorrows and hardships float down the pipes into the sewer and are disposed of, dissolved. After all, tomorrow will be a new day, and, consequently, a new life.

How to forget a loved one? Yes, very easy! Through new acquaintances and fresh impressions. This does not mean that you should forget your former friends, but for a while you should refuse to interact with people who cross paths with an ex-boyfriend.

Many young ladies have a hard time enduring a gap due to its incorrect perception. They believe that after parting with a young man, they become lonely. This is a fundamentally wrong belief. The end of a relationship is not loneliness, but freedom. Freedom that can be spent on self-development, on watching your favorite melodramas that you could not watch before, because your loved one considered them boring. Breaking the connection is a time to think about the future, change yourself, go to school or change jobs. This is the time for any personal accomplishments.

You don't have to be afraid of loneliness. After all, the problem is not in this terrifying word, but solely in relation to its meaning. In life, you need to learn to be happy always - being in a relationship with the most beloved person and parting with him.