What to do if the wife took the son and left? Go to the police, what can they do? The child is only a month old. and got the best answer

Answer from FSSP Priozersk[newbie]
Article 55 UK Separation of parents does not affect the rights of the child.
In the case of separation of parents, the child has the right to communicate with each of them. The child has the right to communicate with his parents also in the case of their residence in different states.
Art. 66 UK A parent who lives separately from the child has the right to communicate with the child, participate in his upbringing and resolve issues of the child's education.
The parent with whom the child lives must not interfere with the communication of the child with the other parent, if such communication does not harm the physical and mental health of the child, his moral development.
2. Parents have the right to conclude in writing an agreement on the procedure for exercising parental rights by a parent living separately from the child.
If the parents cannot reach an agreement, the dispute is resolved by the court with the participation of the guardianship and guardianship authority at the request of the parents (one of them).
3. In case of failure to comply with the court decision, the measures provided for by the civil procedural legislation are applied to the guilty parent. In case of malicious failure to comply with the court decision, the court, at the request of a parent living separately from the child, may decide to transfer the child to him based on the interests of the child and taking into account the opinion of the child.

Answer from Maggie[guru]
it’s okay to treat her, that’s what to do .... just like that, a woman won’t leave with such a small child

Answer from Yoeryoga[newbie]
contact cdn

Answer from Dolphin[guru]
The police will not do anything: the child is with his mother. You will have to solve this problem yourself.

Answer from Peshkova Elena[guru]
I agree with Maggie!

Answer from Lara[guru]
Just like that, a wife with a child would not have run away. Look for the reason in yourself, and your mother-in-law's wife and child.

Answer from Mila[guru]
If you start a war, no one will win, and everyone will be exhausted. If she is a normal mother, then leave everything as it is - nothing will happen to the child, slowly try to find her or change her mind when it is difficult and let you know about yourself. And if you tormented her, stop, do not insist on your own, this victory will be lined with flour and tears. Let time pass, do not torment your loved ones, because your child is there. Life will pass, but your deeds will remain in the children - nothing will be done to the child with a good mother. Although being a reliable, calm father nearby and being a protector of one's family, and not a burden, is the meaning of life for a man, and not drinking and walking, never growing out of moral irresponsible "diapers" throughout his life ...

Answer from Kirill Derksen[guru]
It's good that you didn't quit, what would you do with him?

Answer from Vladimir Babchenko[expert]
One option is only through the court in the order of Part 2 of Art. 16 RF IC.
According to Part 1 of Art. 61 of the Family Code of the Russian Federation, parents have equal rights and bear equal obligations in relation to their children.
According to Part 1 of Art. 55 the child has the right to communicate with both parents
According to Art. 77 of the RF IC, when applying to the guardianship authorities in case of a threat to the life and health of the child, the guardianship authority has the right to take the child away from one of the parents
As you can see, everything is decided by law, but just what will you do with a one-month-old baby in your arms? My opinion - solve all the showdowns with your wife without the participation of the child, the baby is not a relay baton. If the wife lives in such shitty conditions, maybe it's better to leave yourself, leaving her a comfortable apartment?

Answer from Grandfather[guru]
Moreover, the police, there is no corpus delicti. She has the right to leave, her child, this is not a kidnapping. If you want to determine the procedure for communicating and raising a child when the parents live apart, you can contact the guardianship and guardianship authority if the wife does not want to conclude an agreement. Do not agree - you can go to court. And you can sue property, not children.
Have you tried to find an intelligent psychologist to begin with? If a woman with a baby leaves voluntarily for a house without amenities, it would not be bad to figure out the reasons.

Answer from Inga[guru]
I didn't understand the humor. Would you like her to leave the baby and leave without him? Since she is more comfortable with her mother in the village than with you in the city - draw conclusions about your wealth as the father of the family. And in order to sue a month-old baby, you need to become a nursing woman

Answer from Natalia Victorovna[guru]
Well, you won’t take a child away from your mother at the age of 1 month, if she is not a drunkard and does not leave him unattended.
The police won't help you. These are private matters. There is no crime here. They will not bring your wife back under escort. And even more so to take away the child from her.
On this go to guardianship. express your concerns. You will be told what you are entitled to.
In general, the right - generalized. And the duty is to keep.

Answer from Timur[guru]
baby breastfeeding
should be with mother
he is with her
you can not go to the police - there is no reason to file a complaint

Answer from 3 answers[guru]

Hello! Here is a selection of topics with answers to your question: What if the wife took her son and left? Go to the police, what can they do? The child is only a month old.

Good afternoon. In general, the situation is as follows. My wife cheated on a man she met on the bus and that same evening rented an apartment for a day. I forgave her, a week later I found out that she continues to communicate with this person. When meeting with this man, he said that she herself was imposed on him, and he did not need her with her problems. After a quarrel (she rushed to fight me because I called him), I left the apartment, and she was with the child. The next day, her father entered the apartment through a window on the second floor, opened the apartment (I took the keys from her) and took out all the documents and things. From the 28th, she does not get in touch, ignores all calls and SMS, VK is blacklisted.

I am not deprived of parental rights, we do not judge, I work. I wrote a statement to the police against her father, but they said that it was a refusal material, since my wife and I were not divorced. The bottom line is this: how do I locate the child and ensure that the child either lives with me or spends 50% of the time?

Timur

There's an answer

Responsible

Mukhin Dmitry AndreevichLawyer

Until you are formally divorced, you are a family, and this greatly complicates all processes. But, nevertheless, you have the right, referring to Article 61 of the RF IC (equality of rights and obligations of parents), to apply to the district court at your own place of residence (Article 29 of the Code of Civil Procedure of the Russian Federation) to determine the place of residence of your child. If you are not going to continue to be married to this woman, then you can simply file an application to the court for divorce, and already during the court session you will be able to make demands on the division of jointly acquired property and determine the question of which parent the child will remain with, the order of visits of a parent living separately from the child and other issues (Article 24 of the RF IC).

I want to note that at first it is still worth trying to find the whereabouts of the spouse and try to resolve all the conflicts out of court, and only after that apply for help to the guardianship and guardianship authorities or to the court, so you will save a lot of time and nerves.

There are no situations in life that could not be resolved for the benefit of all participants in the events. Thinking people try to analyze and understand why everything happened. What conclusions should be drawn in order not to try to enter the same river twice. Fools keep making mistakes, stepping on a rake again and again. Smart people learn from the mistakes of others. When the wife left with the child, any man wonders what to do next? Is it worth returning the one that runs from the sinking family ship? Or is it better to leave everything as it is and not run after her? To understand this puzzle, you need to understand what family relationships are built on. What reasons prompted a woman to take such a serious step.

Was there love

Bouquets, sweets, vows of eternal love - everyone goes through this, at least once in a lifetime. For some, this period drags on for decades, but most people resign themselves to the gray routine of life. Was there love? It is often confused with completely different feelings.

1. Jealousy. The desire to completely possess a person, the need for every minute control is often confused with love.
2. A pity. Sometimes people pity those who are close to them, falsely perceiving this as love. So you can feel sorry for the hamster that is tired, but it's a pity to throw it away, because it will die. In such cases, a far-fetched understanding of responsibility plays a fatal role.
3. Habit. Good, warm, satisfying - we go with the flow, protecting ourselves, trying not to get into whirlwinds of passions and experiences. In its own way, a convenient model that suits many people. So you can live your whole life, unless you meet on the way ... true love.

All these factors play a key role when suddenly faced with a situation in which a wife with a child leaves the family.

Is it worth returning

This is the main question to ask yourself first. If love reigns in your little world, you can forgive everything. In this case, the woman should be returned. If there is no love, you are tired of each other to death - think about it, maybe the departure of your wife is your chance to start everything from scratch. In what cases is it better not to save a family:

• if your life has become one continuous scandal;
• any little thing ends in squabbles, tears, screams;
• the wife does not cause any feelings other than irritation, anger, aggression;
• the spouse has not shown you signs of attention for a long time, being interested only in the financial component of family life;
• a woman constantly flirts with other men, making you jealous, and after scenes of jealousy she accuses you of a scandal;
• you feel that you are unable to restrain yourself, and it will come to assault.

These are bad calls that indicate that there is no happiness in your home. But, even in this case, remember 2 things:

• no matter how your relationship with her develops, you are the father. Children love dad, you should give them all support;
• seek help from a family psychologist, perhaps the wife decided to leave the family with the child because she feels the same as you. The specialist will help you figure out how to behave and what to do next.

Causes

Family life is based on the desires, ambitions and interaction of two people. In most cases, both are to blame. There are the most common reasons why a woman is ready to take her children and leave her hearth.

1. Husband's power. If a man tries to subjugate the life of his wife, controlling her every step, sooner or later everything will end in flight. How quickly the relationship breaks up depends on the nature of the wife. Calm, downtrodden girls succumb to addictions, who, in the face of fear of loneliness or due to upbringing, are ready to put their interests, career and all of themselves at the feet of a husband who is not always loving, but very powerful. In his face, she wants to see protection, love, an established life. For this woman is ready to do everything. Often her dream turns into a duty, and a closed little world into a prison.
2. Spouse dependency. This is a pathological case. Where there is alcohol or drug addiction, there cannot be a normal family. There are no women who like to look at a man drinking and sinking every day, to see his impotence. Unless, of course, she does the same. Morning "ambre" also does not add points to him. Alcohol or drug abuse leads to:
   • to the degradation of personality;
   • lack of livelihood;
   • domestic violence.

These arguments can break even strong relationships. After futile attempts to restore the former harmony, the woman will leave her husband and take the children. He can only blame himself for this.

1. Domestic violence often stems from the first two factors. What makes a man beat his wife and children or harass them morally?
   • diffidence;
   • lack of self-sufficiency;
   • desire to establish itself at the expense of the weaker.

Can a woman live with such a man? Perhaps at first, yes. She has hope that things will change soon. But, this cannot go on for long. Sooner or later, the instinct of self-preservation and the preservation of offspring will give its result. The family will collapse.

1. Constant betrayals. Many men consider themselves polygamous beings. Their half is unlikely to like it. Arguments such as: fear for the health of children and financial costs are out of the interests of the family, a sane woman will be forced to think about what to do next. In some cases, the wife is ready to endure the betrayal of her husband if he is a caring father and provides well for her and the children. This happens with couples who have lived together for a long period. At first, the wife painfully endures her partner's new novels, but, making sure that he does not seek to leave the family, she gets used to it and does not pay attention to them. The man continues to do the same. This happens until another person appears in her life.
2. New feelings. Women are less likely to go to break family relationships because of inflamed passions. This happens when the marriage was built on respect, affection, or if the husband managed to annoy well. Great love can break old relationships built without fire. In the case when the new chosen one really loves the woman, finds an approach to her and her children, the chances of breaking the marriage are growing rapidly.
3. Sexual incompatibility. If in youth the sexual needs of the couple coincided, in adulthood, under the influence of hormonal changes, appetites can differ greatly. A woman makes her husband hear herself, he brushes it off in response. At this moment, a partner who has turned up, who is ready to satisfy the desire and get married, can solve the problem not in favor of marriage.
4. Irresponsibility. There is a category of men who remain boys at 50. They are accustomed to putting their interests and every minute desires above the interests of the family. If a woman is afraid to leave her baby to her husband, who sees no one but herself, a break is inevitable. The wife is looking for support in a man. She doesn't want another child. One day, she gets tired of it, and the wife and children leave home.

Reaction

The first thing a man feels is a blow to his ego. Rare representatives of the strong half of humanity are ready to sit down and analyze the reasons for the gap. Most abandoned husbands, instead of thinking about what to do next, are ready to succumb to emotions. Here are the feelings most often caused by the departure of a wife and child:

• resentment;
• anger;
• self-pity;
• desire for revenge;
• hatred;
• the desire to break away from reality with the help of alcohol.

Someone is looking for a spouse to make a scandal. For some, hatred settles in the heart, which blinds and makes it impossible to adequately assess the situation, to take the right steps. You need to pull yourself together and think about the true reasons for what happened. In order to understand what to do, sit down and listen to yourself and your desires.

Solutions

Answer yourself a few questions:

• do I love my wife;
• am I behaving correctly towards her and the children;
• how could I offend her;
• whether there have always been difficulties in relationships or have they appeared recently;
• do I want my wife and children back;
• am I ready to admit my guilt in this situation;
• have I done everything to fully provide for my loved ones;
• Am I prepared to avoid making the same mistakes in the future?

It is worth understanding how serious your spouse's intentions are. Often a woman leaves the family in order to prove her readiness for drastic actions if the family puzzle is not resolved in her favor. Whether such a path is justified depends on the situation itself. Sometimes, leaving is the cardinal action that burns bridges. After a little analysis of your feelings for your spouse, you need to develop a strategy and strictly follow it.

What to do

There are several steps that need to be taken.

1. In the case when the problem lies in alcohol addiction or an overabundance of attention to female representatives, decide what is more expensive for you: family, alcohol or other women. If your addictions are stronger than you, give peace to your wife, she has the right to happiness. Family is more expensive - say goodbye to a bad habit, sacredly keeping your promise to your wife. Perhaps this is the last chance to save yourself and not slide into a deep abyss of degradation.
2. Invite your wife to the negotiating table. In the process of your cold war, children should not suffer in any way. Tolerantly and politely discuss with her how and when you can see them and what you are ready to do for them. Listen to the essence of her claims and the reasons for leaving. Explain to the children that you and your mother had difficulties in relations, but you still love them and remain a caring father. It is desirable that it be so not only in words, but also in deeds. If you want to return a spouse who left the family, this will be an important argument in your favor.
3. A scandal and a desire to arouse pity in a woman are extremes that will once again make her disappointed in you. They will finally convince you of the correctness of leaving such a man. Don't be so stupid.
4. Give her signs of attention, but try to do it without excesses and pressure. Take care of your family like nothing happened. Offer financial help, psychological support. Do not miss the opportunity to help with the housework.
5. Do not manipulate children. If you threaten a woman with taking her children away from her, it will be a final and irreversible collapse. It will automatically add you to the list of enemies. Any mother is ready to turn into an aggressive tigress if someone encroaches on her children. Such a thought is the worst of all that can visit your head.
6. Try to fulfill her desires, if they are reasonable. To discuss your problems and find ways to solve them, it is better to use neutral territory. After the wife has left the family, invite her to a cafe or restaurant. Bring in some romance. Perhaps it can stir up your own feelings. Try to move for a while during the candy-bouquet period. Such a strategy will help to defeat a merciless life.
7. If the problem is sex, start with yourself. Visit a specialist. There are always solutions to this problem. There would be a desire.

Important! A woman must understand that no matter what, you remain a reliable, decent and strong partner, a loving husband and a caring father. You are able to navigate the family ship through the storm. If you provoked the breakup, the spouse will be able to forgive and come back. Such husbands are not scattered.

Summarizing

Did she decide not to come back? Remember the main thing:

• you gave each other wonderful moments;
• you have common children, which means that you are, in a sense, blood relatives;
• no one knows how your life will develop further;
• in difficult life situations, you leaned on each other.

Therefore, behave like a civilized, well-mannered person. Give up the temptation to let your wife go around the world by taking away property. There is nothing more disgusting than a greedy man. Keep friendship, respect, good relationship with your former soul mate. And most importantly, if you still love her, do not give up hope for the rebirth of the family. The woman you love needs to be won again and again, at any age and in any situation. Doing good to relatives is a pleasant mission.

“It’s better to raise children separately than to hold on to a failing marriage just for their sake.”

Roman Vinilov.

Hello! Roman Vinilov is in touch.

And today we have a much more complicated topic than usual. Let's talk about what to do if a marriage with children falls apart. I want to immediately divide the situation into two independent components: wife and children. You can communicate with children even after a divorce, for this you need to properly build relationships with your ex-wife.

Sometimes it is the children that come to the fore, and the spouses live together precisely for the sake of them. For better or worse, everyone's choice, but logic dictates that if parents are unhappy together, their problems can affect parenting. This is the situation that is worth thinking about for a long time, and considering it from different angles. We must try to separate for ourselves the two aspects of marriage - the wife and children - realizing that the relationship with the spouse is in the foreground.

The wife left and took the children. Catastrophe?

Those who grew up in the 90s are well aware of the problem of fatherlessness. Many did not know their fathers, and someone always had a few friends who were brought up only by their mother. It is not surprising that divorce and the separate upbringing of children are perceived extremely negatively in society today. But you need to understand that 15-20 years ago the situation in the country was completely different, and if someone was brought up only by their mother, then something obviously happened to their father. Some abandoned their families and left for a better life, someone got drunk or became a drug addict - and the mother broke off all relations with such a father. And someone even went to prison, died from crime or in military service. That is, peaceful divorces, when everything is in order with both parents, were a rarity. Life was hard, and the future was vague, and even the biggest troubles in the relationship were resolved without a break.

Now everything is different. Most marriages fall apart in the first years of existence. Often, children have already been born, and according to Russian judicial practice, they most often stay with their mother. But is it so bad when parents get divorced? Of course, it is better for children to grow up in a complete family, and it is not known with whom the former will converge, and how the child will be brought up. But in most cases, it is possible with the ex-wife to agree that you do not interfere with each other in fulfilling parental responsibilities. This is much better than when a marriage is based solely on children. Prolonged discord between parents has an extremely negative effect on the psyche of the child. And vice versa - there are a huge number of stories in which former spouses manage to adequately raise children, and they love their father no less than their mother. In education, the most important thing is a personal example, and a constant presence next to the child and attempts to teach something.

According to the law, the ex-wife cannot forbid the father to communicate with the children. If you are normal - you don’t drink, you’re not a drug addict, you don’t have problems with the law, you are ready to financially help children (including alimony) - then there are unlikely to be problems in communicating and raising children. Of course, there are situations when the ex-wife behaves inappropriately: she tries to do everything to excommunicate her ex-husband from the children, sets them against him. But then one of the questions can be closed - why do you need such a woman. We still specialize in returns, and relationships with children are already a more subtle topic. In addition, time will put everything in its place, the children will grow up and understand everything themselves. Yes, and you can almost always establish communication with your wife, and go forward if you offended her with something, for the sake of offspring.

Therefore, it is worth considering what is more important: children or an ex-wife? Do you love her? Do you think that she still loves you too, and that you will be better together? Just be honest.

The wife left with the children. What to do?

In general, the situation with a divorce, when there are children, should be considered in the same way as a return in any other relationship. You can return. And children in this case are an added advantage. Just don’t tell her directly and even hint that no one will need her “with a trailer” - this is quite insulting and sounds like the words of an offended person. She must understand this herself.

Children are what binds you, and does not serve as an instrument of struggle.

You can't use them as a tool. In the process of returning an ex-girlfriend or wife, a man who has been successful in the early stages begins to communicate with his beloved again. And at this moment (if everything is fine), the girl has no negativity, and only positive memories pop up in her head. Everywhere she looks, everything reminds her of him. And in the eyes of her children, she sees her husband, remembers how they played together and spent time - everyone was happy. This cannot be manipulated, but it is a powerful argument for the restoration of relations.

1. You must live separately. Of course, if she left with the child for another, this has already happened. But there are situations when a husband and wife diverge, but continue to live under the same roof. This is a specific tin, and so the relationship cannot be returned. If she has nowhere to go, then go yourself. You are a man, and you must find ways to earn as much as you need - your family is at stake.
2. Don't cut off contact with your wife. Yes, in other cases, most often they advise a complete ignore, during which you need to work hard on yourself. But here the situation is different - she left with the children, and you cannot not see them.
3. Chat like friends. Completely exclude flirting and any hints. You broke up, you want to be a good father and you are not going to return her, divorce is her choice.
4. No conversations and clarification of relations. Your relationship is taboo. Politely walk away from any talk about you, from mutual claims and debriefings. Any negativity must be gone. There is still a long way to go for a refund.
5. Work on yourself. Start earning more (she will certainly notice this), develop comprehensively - read, study, go to courses. Find new hobbies, make life rich. Go to the gym and regain your physical youth.
6. Participate in the upbringing of children. Your divorce does not change anything - you do not cease to be the father of your children and have every right to take care of them. Children, even if they are small, are not as stupid as one might think. They understand everything, but something can be explained. And if they are already teenagers, then divorce does not change anything at all. Today, there are a lot of opportunities to always be in contact. Do not give money for children directly to your wife (if it is not alimony) - buy and pay for everything you need yourself.

If the wife is with a child, this is bad, but not fatal. A woman, other things being equal, will always choose the father of her children, and it’s not just possible to become better than another man - it’s your responsibility. What you do not need to do exactly is to come into conflict with him.

What's next?

If everything goes well, then you yourself will notice a change in her attitude towards you. The ex-wife will definitely begin to actively take an interest in your new life and give other signs that she wants to return. But the return process is complex and thorny, and most importantly, it does not tolerate mistakes. To make them is simple: you relax a little, and you throw back all your efforts.

Therefore, study mine, come to the forum and tell your story (or read similar ones), seek personal advice. The situation when the wife left for another with children is difficult, but there is a way out of it. Especially if you turn to professionals.

Sincerely, Roman Vinilov.

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