It is possible to forget and not remember your ex-boyfriend. Even the most painful breakup can be survived. Even a heart broken into small pieces can be mended. Even the brightest romance eventually turns into a mere memory. But what to do if you keep returning to your past relationships in your thoughts?

What's stopping you from thinking about your ex? Why doesn’t time, other novels, and even working on yourself help?

These are 25 reasons why you just can't leave the past in the past.

1. You believe in kinship of souls and are convinced that you will not meet anyone closer.

2. You had true love, but it does not pass without a trace.

3. You have never loved anyone so much.

4. Your future was planned out years in advance.

5. You saw him as the father of your children.

6. It’s hard for you to change your habits.

7. He reminds you of yourself.

8. You have mutual friends.

9. Your life was organized, and your home was comfortable and cozy.

10. You were sure that this would be forever.

11. You don't believe that you can love someone again.

12. You don't believe that someone will love you again.

13. After your breakup, you see each other often.

14. You are friends with benefits.

15. You decided to remain friends. You agreed because you weren't ready to let him out of your life.

16. You carefully monitor his life on social networks and ask mutual friends about him.

17. He was the initiator of the breakup. Your pride has been dealt a heavy blow, and you cannot come to terms with it.

18. He was not only your boyfriend, but also your best friend.

19. You don't know how to be alone.

20. You have lost your inner harmony.

21. Your breakup destroyed your self-esteem, and you just can’t recover.

22. You are waiting for him to come to his senses and return.

23. You don’t want and can’t believe that he loved you less than you loved him. Or perhaps he didn’t love him at all.

24. You don't have good relationships with other men.

25. You don't want to forget him.

It doesn't really matter what the reason is that you can't forget him. There are always two options - he really is your destiny, and sooner or later you will be together again, or you love unrequitedly, and he will never return to you. In both cases, you must think about yourself. Take care of your own life, develop, achieve your goals, become the best version of yourself. Not for him or anyone else, but for myself. Life does not stand still, and we choose what it will be like ourselves.

Accept that you cannot forget him as a fact. Take this knowledge to the farthest corner of your soul and move on with your life. Yours will come back to you. Yours will not pass by. Yours will be yours.

Chances are, we all have memories that people would like to forget. A disturbing incident, an embarrassing situation, humiliation, insults from a loved one - it could be anything. And no matter how hard you try to forget it, the memory resists.

There is no need to suppress all unpleasant thoughts. There are times when you need to reflect on what went wrong so you can learn from your mistakes and move on. But when the only effect of your thoughts is to prolong the pain, you need to get rid of them and move on.

Recent research suggests that people can program themselves to forget things on purpose. Here's how to forget what you don't want to remember.

Drive away bad thoughts

Making a conscious decision not to think about bad memories can help erase them forever. When you are reminded of something you don't want to think about, don't let your mind think about it.

Forget all the details associated with memories

To get rid of bad memories, forget about the details, people, and emotions associated with them. Details may include smells, sounds or images associated with an event you do not want to remember. For example, if you don't want to think about a traumatic event, remove the details associated with it from your mind. It could be the song playing in the background or the faces that were looking at you at the time.

Do this daily

Suppressing unpleasant memories is difficult. Any thought that is suppressed tends to ricochet. For example, if you want to block the emotions associated with a car accident, your brain looks for any thought about it to block it. This makes it, so to speak, more accessible. That is, when you don’t block it, the thought rushes back and again haunts you. Thus, you need to block memories on a daily basis. You need to regularly push them out of your consciousness.

Don't focus too much on blocking thoughts

Blocked thoughts tend to come to life faster and more strongly when you give them too much meaning and attention. Recognize the fact that suppressing thoughts is very difficult, but you must continue to work at it, while trying not to overdo it.

Avoid triggers

Certain images, objects, smells or places may trigger bad memories for you. Remove objects or images that are preventing you from forgetting something you don't want to remember from your mind. Avoid places or meeting people that remind you of your painful past.

Distract your mind

Another strategy you can try is to replace the bad memory with something good. If the thought of a past failure continues to haunt you, try thinking about how you succeeded at something in the past. Don't let bad memories affect your mood. As soon as they wash over you, start thinking about something good.

Associate something positive with a bad memory

Learn to associate negative thoughts with positive ones. This will help you overcome bad feelings. For example, think about your bad moment while enjoying a good movie, or do something that makes you happy. A positive association will make your negative memory less painful.

Become aware of the memory

Another theory suggests that becoming fully aware of the memory and the negative emotions associated with it will help you cope with painful emotions. Feel angry, sad, or hurt. Squeal, scream, cry. Let go of your emotions to reduce their power over you.

Use a release ritual to erase your memory

This is a mental exercise, a kind of ritual to free yourself from negative emotions or memories that have settled in your mind. Write down every detail of the memory that you want to forget. Allow yourself to write openly, knowing that no one will read it. Then you need to burn the sheet of paper. When you see that the paper is on fire, you mentally release the memory. Alternatively, you can also tear or shred the paper into small pieces, this also helps a lot.

Practice mindfulness

Learn to focus on the present moment instead of thinking and worrying about your past, which cannot be changed or predicted in the future. Don't go through your day on autopilot. Notice and pay attention to small details, sights, smells and sounds. Regular meditation practice will help you to be mindful and appreciate every moment of life.

Live your life to the fullest and create good memories

Always be around people who make you happy. If possible, travel and meet new people. Communicate as much as possible. This will help you form new good memories, which will naturally make your bad memories disappear.

Don't sit idle

Invent a new hobby or physical activity. Devote yourself to creativity and take part in arts and crafts activities. Spend your energy creating something new, or try yourself as a volunteer. You will be constantly busy and have less time to spend thinking about bad memories.

Talk to someone about it

Talking to a trusted friend or family member can help. Their advice, opinions and similar stories can give you a different perspective on things and help you forget what you don't want to remember.

By following all these tips, you will be able to erase bad memories from your memory and gain complete control over your life.

Content
1. Analyze it...
2. Self-flagellation is natural, but wrong
3. Polarities of consciousness, or What is going on in our heads?
4. The science of forgetting: how does our memory work?
5. Universal balm for the wounds of yesteryear
6. Achieving a goal is not enough - you need to be able to consolidate it

Analyze this...

Torment, regardless of its source, is a purely individual matter. Even if this is a cliche, but only the “drowning” himself can help a drowning person in these days. Of course, things will go much faster with the support of a specialist who will quickly determine the cause of the blues and direct the patient’s thoughts in the right direction. But if a psychoanalyst is not for you, you will have to forget past memories by working through their milestones yourself.
The main tool in the fight against stress is self-analysis - after all, in order to cope with the problem, you first need to clearly outline it. Yes, if a person is consumed by some moment or even an entire period of the past, the scope of search will narrow. But a spiritual panacea does not lie on the surface, and discovering it completely by accident is a truly incredible task. Overthinking the situation endlessly is not an option; it is necessary to analyze, having a specific vector of information processing.

Self-flagellation is natural, but wrong

The classic “wound” that does not heal over time is destroyed love. 95% of people who are looking for a way not to remember the past are trying to drown out raging feelings for their once loved ones. Of course, there are other reasons: bonded labor, stress, illness or even the death of a friend. But they are all fundamentally one, and this root is memory.
To get rid of memories, simply stop feeding them. Yes, a sad person wants to listen to sad music, savor stories about unhappy love and discuss them with friends. Yes, self-flagellation during the peak period is enjoyable for most people. But this is a direct path to self-destruction, such is human perception.

Polarities of consciousness, or What's going on in our heads?

Our thinking is designed to keep our worldview as stable as possible. Subconsciously, everyone searches around for elements that resonate as much as possible with their current emotional state. If you fall into depression, you will “bump into” things that will strengthen it - sad music, sad films, poems about broken hearts, etc. How can you forget the past if with each “session” of such subconscious stabilization you plunge into a pool of memories?
The subconscious mind does not care whether it does bad things to its owner or good ones - it is, in principle, devoid of these concepts, and simply works according to the existing algorithm. You can put up with this or fight it fruitlessly, but it’s better to use it to your advantage. It is not difficult to achieve a goal - it is enough to realize that emotions are internal, and external factors do not influence a person. Without his consent...
So, if you look for ways to eliminate “I feel bad,” the consciousness will “get hooked” on the negative formulation. To get rid of the past, you need to aim for the future. The subconscious has no concept of denial, so you need to knock out a wedge with a wedge. Surround yourself as much as possible with what is opposite to the oppressive state - attitudes towards the future - and in the first days you will see the result. But in working on how to forget past relationships, this stage is only the starting stage; the real work is ahead.

The science of forgetting: how does our memory work?

Human memory, even with the current development of science, is considered a phenomenon, that is, an inexplicable phenomenon. But inexplicability is not such a significant obstacle. The first “electrologists” like Faraday, Gauss and Ampere, not knowing what electricity is, actually created the basis of modern life, without ever getting through to the origins of the forces that they conquered.
Also, other scientists, studying the phenomena of memory, agreed that it is structured like... a PC hard drive. Some phenomena that create a specific neural combination once may leave no traces at all and disappear instantly - this is a “cache”, instant memory. Some memories that require infrequent but quick access—like songs and poems by heart—are “flash drives.” Well, if information is needed constantly, it will be recorded “on the hard drive” - in long-term memory.
But how will this help you get rid of memories of past relationships? Very simple! Memory is technically infinite, but the paths to information are limited. They can be compared to a multi-channel wire - each is connected to a specific section and passes a strictly limited flow of information. Other data is sent to the “archive” to save resources. The brighter the emotional experiences, and the more often the phenomenon is repeated, the more securely the “wire” is fixed.

A universal balm for the wounds of yesteryear

The limitations of the human body for those experiencing grief are not a disadvantage, but a blessing. To let go of something, you just need to switch the “wire” to another area. Negative memories will not go anywhere - technically, but they will still disappear from life, as if you recorded information from a hard drive on a CD and hid it far away in the pantry.
To achieve this, follow a similar method - strengthen the “channels” of access to information obtained with new experience. So, in order to leave behind the troubles of the past days, you need to follow simple recommendations:

Burn bridges. How to forget your past life if everything leads to it again and again? Remove from your environment anything that brings back memories of the time or person who caused you pain. Throw away the teddy bear, “that same” shirt, souvenirs from trips and the like, or better yet, give it to the poor. Delete memorable photographs, and burn printed ones with romantic letters and cute “souvenirs” like a scented herbarium. Change home and job, finally. Get rid of the temptation from the very opportunity to indulge in passive masochism, which destroys you from the inside.
Learn new things. “Clog” the channels with fresh neural combinations, leaving no room for yesterday’s negativity. Do something previously unknown - your brain will switch from the blues of past grievances to something new. Take a painting or pottery class, play hockey or fly a glider, skydive or go on a trip.
Play sports. The universal “cure” for depression is athletics. Running and swimming are the best options, and after 30 kilometers of cross-country cycling, depression will get tired of chasing you. The main thing is without fanaticism; muscle overload can stimulate depression, and therefore there is no need to focus on “rocking exercises”.
Communicate. Consciousness is structured in such a way that an individual outside the “pack” strives for stasis - mental “conservation”, which completely inhibits the way out of a depressed state. Communicate. But! Without the usual framework and routine; contact strangers, discover new people. The best solution would be to engage in a hobby that involves communication - theater, public speaking, and the “air” will be filled with positivity.
Learn. Studying is a panacea for mental wounds. Here are new people, communication, unknown emotions, and flows of information... If you have had your heart broken, go to university or sign up for courses to learn a new profession. This will not only improve your emotional background, giving you the opportunity to move on with your life, but also, perhaps, reveal a talent that can radically change your life. And, of course, a new profession is a plus in a purely pragmatic sense, as a source of additional income.

Achieving a goal is not enough - you need to be able to consolidate it

All advice is good, as long as it is not overshadowed by unforgivable stupidity. If you are still wondering how to forget your past relationship and start a new one, don’t rush. You risk simply transferring the image of the old person to the new one, and therefore you will take a “double blow.” Wait for the memory to “heal” - it will happen quickly if you follow the instructions.
The right method of distraction will greatly influence your life, perhaps turn it upside down. You will become a different person and stop living in the past, because you will plunge into the present with ecstasy and appetite for life. These truisms are the best (and only) way to safely put aside troubles and leave your old life behind.

But anyone who has encountered this at least once in their life knows from their own experience that these tips do not work. What can be achieved if you follow them is to push the painful experience deep down, and cover it with visible well-being on top. It looks like a deep wound that was healed superficially, but the internal pain was forgotten to be removed. It is invisible, but it hurts and eats away the soul from the inside.

Any psychologist will tell you that there is only one path to recovery - to survive the separation from your husband or the man you still love - this is to fully and deeply do the necessary work of grief. And then you will grow, be renewed, live a full life, come out of a difficult situation with valuable experience, and gain strength and wisdom. The wound will not disappear without a trace - a scar will form in its place, but it will remind you of your strength and perseverance, and not of pain and suffering. After all, scars are stronger than skin.

The best thing to do if breaking up with a loved one is causing you great pain is to consult a psychologist and get professional help. Do not believe if they offer you quick healing in 1-5 meetings. No matter how much you want to get rid of the pain as quickly as possible, you need to do the work of grief, and every wounded soul needs its own time.

Advice: choose a psychologist who works with grief seriously and deeply, who will listen to you carefully and with understanding, who you will completely trust, who will be ready to worry with you as much as necessary.

If you do not have the opportunity to contact a psychologist or for some reason you do not want to, then you can take the following steps.

Three simple steps on how to forget the person you love, but he doesn’t love you:

Step 1 – accept the situation as it is. This is the first and most difficult step. A girl who is going through a breakup with her lover usually lives in the past. She remembers happy moments with her boyfriend or man. If she loved, she had expectations about a future together, she dreamed of marrying him, having a family and children, and living happily for many years.

She refuses to believe what happened and tries to live as before, as if a man or boyfriend were with her. Accepting that it’s all destroyed is very difficult and painful. However, sooner or later this will have to be done.

Advice: look at the situation from the reality of today: yes, it happened; yes, the past life is destroyed; yes, a miracle will not happen. Acceptance is usually accompanied by a feeling of disorientation and chaos.

Step 2 – let your feelings out. Usually this is resentment, anger, rage. Don't push them deep into yourself. They must come out. In women, these feelings usually pour out with streams of tears.

Advice: Cry! Pour out the rivers, the oceans of your pain. If you feel angry, throw it out! Hit the dishes, growl, scream! Tear the sheet! Stomp on the pillow! Feelings for a guy or a man who needs to be forgotten must come out of you.

Step 3 – Tell your story. It doesn’t matter if it’s a friend or a random person you meet in a cafe. Get an intuitive sense of who you can trust with your story. Grief is a universal experience for all people, and you are more likely to be heard. Once is usually not enough.

Advice: tell as many times as necessary so that the wound heals and you can forget your ex-husband or boyfriend whom you once loved very much.

Usually, after completing these stages, a person experiences sadness and a bright emptiness. This means that you have already accepted the situation and let go of the past. Now you are on the threshold of a new life.

And lastly, how not to remember the beloved man whom you still love. In the past, you had many happy, wonderful moments with this person. Yes, the relationship is over. But you have known joy, love, happiness, delight, a lot of light and beauty. After all, this happened in your life thanks to this person.

Now you can keep these wonderful bright memories for yourself as resources for the future. Thank life for this gift and try to forget the person you loved so much. Go further. On your way you will meet many more amazing things!

Unfortunately, it’s difficult to part with your loved ones, especially forever. Pain and resentment will forever remain in your heart, but they can be overshadowed by love, now unrequited.
How to get rid of painful feelings? Trying to read the plot is the only magical way to forget a person and your love for him.

Such conspiracies and rituals are read only on the waning moon, with which feelings will lose strength and leave you forever.

It is best to choose the third quarter of the waning moon - this is the most favorable time for quickly achieving results.

How to forget a loved one - an effective conspiracy

To carry out the ritual, you need to pick lemon balm leaves, divide them into two parts, leave one of them at home, and take the second with you to a source of clean water, for example, a spring.

It is best if this source has healing or magical properties, but if there is none in your area, do not be discouraged, use what is available, the main thing is that the water is so pure that it can be drunk.

There should be no one besides you near the source. Sit by the water and think about yourself, your broken heart, the overflowing pain and grief that needs to be thrown out. Mentally imagine lemon balm petals as your tears, as well as their root cause. Slowly throw one leaf into the water and watch how the water carries away your feelings of separation.
Do not leave the water until you feel complete peace and get rid of the images that cause you torment. When this moment comes, scoop up water with your palm, wash the area of ​​your heart and chest with it, then fill the bottle with water and go home.

At home, pour water into a glass into which you add the remaining lemon balm leaves and leave it near your bed for three days. In the morning and evening, you need to rub your heart with this water, thinking about the spring and the sensations that you felt when the water took away your pain and sadness, then take one sip of water.
When three days have passed, take the remaining water with mint back to the stream and pour it into it, thus getting rid of the remaining feelings.

If your pain does not go away completely, the ritual can be repeated after a week.

A conspiracy to forget a man

The following ritual will help you forget your beloved man. On the waning moon, pour two handfuls of poppy seeds into a deep plate, which should be poured with one glass of hot water, saying:

“Hot water is my feelings for you, servant of God (name of your beloved). They are just as hot, but like water, they will cool over time.”

The plate should be placed on the window and wait until the water cools down and reaches room temperature, after which the entire contents of the container should be poured under a dry tree, saying 5 times:

“My feelings were burning, burning and knew no peace. I wandered through the forests and mountains, longing for my dear one. An Angel came down to me and relieved me of a heavy burden. He broke my feelings into poppy grains and put out the fire in my soul with water. The smoke rose and flew far, far away from me with the wind. Now I walk and don’t know any troubles, I don’t cry, I don’t grieve, I don’t love.”

To stop loving a person

Clasp your hands over your chest and look at a photo that you need to quickly forget. The photograph should be placed upside down, and a piece of black bread should be placed in front of it. Repeat the ritual 7 days in a row. After each ritual, give the bread to the birds.
CONSPIRACY:

“Servant of God (name), stand as you stand.
Bread, lie as you lie.
I will remember you not with love, but with cold blood.
How can I, a servant of God, forget
how I walked my first steps as a child,
as my first tooth grew, so from now on until the century
forget about this man
servant of God (name). Amen".

A conspiracy to forget a person

“Accept, Lord, my prayer, in the name of the Father and the Son and the Holy Spirit. Amen! The first time, at the Lord's hour, I walked in the morning. In the evening I reached Mount Zion, the holy river. The Mother of God stands by that river, looking intently at me, God’s servant (name). He splashes his hand along the river, washes me, the servant of God (name), out of melancholy and sadness. Chur, holy water, take away, rinse off from me, from the servant of God (name), the melancholy, she can’t be here, she can’t live here. Do not break the white body, do not suffer the zealous poor, do not dry the scarlet blood, do not shiver the little head. Go, sadness and melancholy, to where the big board lies - You can sleep under it, lie down under it. Until the end of the century, leave the baptized person, the servant of God (name), forever and ever. Amen".

What are conspiracies against former partners?

In order to forget someone who abandoned you, time alone is not always enough. Deep resentment, a strong blow, unrequited love - all this can “live” in a person for a long time. A conspiracy to forget anyone will help alleviate suffering, thanks to which you can forget anyone, for example, a son may not remember his mother.
The power of a conspiracy is in words that have a miraculous effect on life. Thanks to words, you can forever get rid of someone who seems to be stuck in your heart forever: a husband, boyfriend, wife, just a loved one. Not everyone can endure a difficult breakup, because the grievances left by a former lover do not go away with a blow of the wind.
Conspiracies can come in various forms. All that is required from you is a strong desire and desire to free your heart after separation. If you are really ready to enter into a new life and start with a clean slate, then get ready for the fact that you only have to wait a little longer. A conspiracy to forget someone you truly love must be uttered by a person with pure intentions and thoughts. Try to let go of grievances for a while, and then they will let you go forever.

A strong ritual for an ex-boyfriend or husband

To forget about a person, try washing your face with the words:

“The time has come for me to wash myself with holy water. Take, take, some water, all my sorrows, and carry them away to distant places. Let them hide in the depths of the sea and not wake up. Amen".

The plot is quite effective for Easter.

Forgetting a loved one using water

Find any natural spring and fill a bucket of water. When going home, you need to remain silent, lower your eyes from strangers. In a house or apartment, stand above the water and begin to speak to it:

“I took water from the well, oh, what pure water. Go away all your sorrows, I don’t want my eyes to recognize my tears again. Let him (name) no longer be dear to me, but let my soul become disgusted.”

After this, at sunset, pour the liquid under any tree or plant.

Forget the person who was caught cheating

It is impossible to forget about the betrayal of a loved one without making an effort. If love does not allow you to completely free your heart, then the following spell is for you. However, remember the following: before starting the ritual, you must prepare your body and adhere to strict fasting for three days, drink only water, and get rid of bad habits. Only after this can you read the plot:

“Lord, I suffered so much that I again rushed to you for help. Help me find the true path and reward me with prudence. I will obey your will, I swear to forgive my beloved. I will clear my conscience and do everything as you say. Nobody is my enemy. Let it be so! Amen".

This method will help you forget about the person in the fastest possible time.

Spells to forget unpleasant moments from the past

“Almighty powers, help me forget all past hurtful grievances, the worst evil and angry anger. Even though it’s very difficult for me, I believe that everything is possible.”

Forgetting someone who died: the best remedy. It is not always only separations that are difficult for a person to bear; very often people cannot come to terms with the death of their loved ones. We offer you a way that will ease the pain of your loved one and help you move on with your life. It is enough to say these words three nights in a row:

“Clear star, dear star, take my sorrows to distant places. Free me from severe anxiety and worry. Even though (name) abandoned me, life goes on, and from now on I am calm. Bless and save. Amen!".

If you suddenly desperately want to call or write a message to your ex, then you shouldn’t fall into despair. Instead, allow yourself this prank, but... only after 30 minutes! Yes, yes, in 30 minutes, you can call or write. In 99% of cases, within half an hour the mind manages to take over the emotions, and you will understand that this should not be done. The remaining 1% - you should at least think about what exactly to write so as not to lose the remnants of your pride.

How to forget a lover, mistress

If you love another person and have a family, this effective spell to forget your loved one will help you get rid of your feelings for your lover or mistress.
You need to wash your face with the enchanted water every morning for seven days, while reading the words of the spell:

“I came early in the morning at dawn in silence and solitude. I want to wash my face with clean, mirror-like water. I want to wash away my sadness, sadness and melancholy from myself. So that I don’t remember you anymore, don’t see you and don’t regret our parting. Let our love sink to the bottom of the sea. Amen".

Such an effective conspiracy helps not only you to forget about the person with whom you had a relationship on the side. After such a sacrament, your lover or mistress will shun you and leave you alone.