This is how it happens: you try to get married, push the groom to the altar, and then bam - you signed, but there is no responsibility on the part of the husband. He does not provide for his family, does not reach for high earnings, he does not care about prosperity in the family, and you have to pull everything yourself.

Why is this happening? Maybe in a hurry to get married? Or did she screw up somewhere?

When the problem is the man

Women love to talk negatively about their husbands. This is ugly, but sometimes they are right: “Yes, I was in a hurry, I didn’t see it, I jumped out to get married, and he turned out to be the hero of not my novel.”

The key word here is "hasty". After all, some couple of years of living together without children would not hurt. The first two years are a time of grinding characters, and they should not be in the candy-bouquet period, but in life together. At this time, you recognize a person, and it makes no sense to wait for him to change.

So what could you have missed in his character because of your haste?

Infantilism

The man did not take place as an adult. Responsibility for him is something out of the realm of fantasy. It is necessary to take guardianship over him himself, than to call him to some serious actions.

Psychic infantilism has nothing to do with mental retardation. A man is not a fool, he perceives the world as it is, but he has no desire to work on himself and develop.

How can you recognize an infantile man:

He is unable to make independent decisions. It must be pushed literally with a poke in the back. Otherwise, all his ideas are childish nonsense.

He has no goals in life. Life goes with the flow - and that's okay. No interests, no aspirations, no inspiration for exploits.

He has dependent tendencies. He does not mind being henpecked, as long as he is not touched and forced to make decisions.

He is unable to adapt. It is difficult for him to change something in life, as this is a real stress for him. He perceives a job change or a move as a catastrophe.

Why does this happen to grown-up men? The main reason is the strange upbringing of parents. Especially if the head of the family has always been an authoritarian mother, and the father is in the last roles. Or it didn't exist at all. Before marriage, the mother wiped her “child” nose, told him what to do, and the guy just relaxed his brain.

What to do with such an infant? In principle, this is not the worst option, because its main distinguishing feature is that it is a follower. In the article you will find out all the options that you can do with him: does he have at least some abilities, is it possible to enlist the help of an influential person, where he needs to work, knowing his psychotype.

You can send him yourself if you really care about this person. The trouble is for that family if both the husband and wife are both naive and infantile. They can multiply endlessly, live in poverty on child benefits and hope for a miracle that will not happen.

Laziness and selfishness

This is the case when the guy is far from being a fool, but he only lifts a finger when the benefit shines specifically for him. "And what will I have for this?" - such a phrase is often found among lazy egoists.

Such a man is in no hurry to get married. And if he already thought up, then “hold on wife”: her commanding voice does not mean anything to him, he will either leave the scandal, or he will bang his fist on the table.

Stupid is that woman who thinks that the birth of a child will push this bumpkin to some kind of action. He is an egoist, he loves only himself, children can only aggravate the already shaky relationship, because their crying will interfere with his sleep, and outdoor games with them are beyond the power of the fool.

Besides:

He will not go to strain on physically hard work, because this can undermine his precious health and fragile psyche.

He will not deal with children with an excuse: “You yourself wanted them, but I didn’t!”. By the way, if it is so, then he will be right.

He will firmly distinguish the financial budget into “mine” and “common”. Moreover, the advantage will be on his side: the family can do without spiritual food, but he cannot.

What can be done? Egoists are very vulnerable at heart, and someone else's opinion is not an empty phrase for them. But the tone of what is said is important to them. If the wife is hysterical, then his majestic ears do not catch the cry. If she praises him, he melts. You can read about this in the article.

The opinion of others (relatives, friends, acquaintances) is also of great importance. If they menacingly call on him to plow for his family, then he will most likely break off all relations with his advisers.

It’s another matter if they act wisely: they admire his achievements, intelligence and success (although all this is in question), and they will hint, they say, what kind of family you have so strange, it doesn’t match you: the wife is poorly dressed, the children are not in mugs walk. Teach your wife to be a real lady, take her shopping, take her to the salon, take those pale ones out for a picnic to sunbathe.

For an egoist, no matter how lazy he is, it is very important that he has all the best, even a family, at least for show. He moved from his place - admire him, rejoice, like a girl, with his gifts. There is no other way with him.

When the woman is the problem

Yes, oddly enough, the wives themselves are to blame for the fact that the husband does not want to provide for the family. What are these reasons?

If she spoiled him

This is a common problem for older women, for whom the main goal is marriage. Good men were dismantled, only infants, egoists and sloths remained. They are opportunists and sometimes swindlers.

And so the dates began: everything on her territory and everything at her expense. Like, I’ll lure, and then he will work for me, good, and shower with gold. But no, this number did not work: he also eats at her expense and pretends that he cannot get a job. And she pities him.

Good with moms. But such a marriage is rarely short-lived. As soon as the “mommy” pushes the spouse out of her territory, he will begin to pretend that he is correcting himself. But when he comes back, he relaxes.

Sometimes such a marriage is normal if the wife lacks such an overgrown child. And they really love each other. And the fact that the husband does not help with money is not a problem, the wife will provide.

If she is selfish

Yes, he provides it to the best of his abilities and capabilities! But everything is not enough for her: she has seen enough of a beautiful life in TV shows, and let's be weird - you need, they say, “like everyone else”, a cool car, a vacation in the Maldives, perfume from Versace.

And the husband is only capable of prosperity in the family. He would be happy to please his wife with frills, but his only fault is that he sometimes wants to sleep at night, and not thresh 24 hours a day. You have to be more modest, girl.

If the family no longer exists

Many women believe that even after a divorce, a stamp in a passport can mean something. Well, the husband did not file for divorce on time, he just left, and even to another, which he provides.

He is obliged to pay child support, he is not obliged to meet with them, but if he is a good father, he will participate in their lives. But he should not take the full provision of the former family into his own hands.

A man in the family is only where he is fed after work and put to bed. Where he is drawn after work, and he will give at least the entire paycheck with joy and trust. And there is no need to call him to conscience, because the wife who did not create comfort and a good microclimate in the family is shameless.

Finally, an unusual technique

Let's do a thought experiment.

Imagine that you have the superpower to "read" men. Like Sherlock Holmes: you look at a man - and you immediately know everything about him and understand what is on his mind. You would hardly be reading this article now in search of a solution to your problem - you would not have any relationship problems at all.

Who said it's impossible? Of course, you won’t read other people’s thoughts, but otherwise there is no magic here - only psychology.

If you're interested, you can. We asked Nadezhda to reserve 100 seats specifically for our website visitors.

Svetlana89

Good afternoon
I'll start a little from afar. I grew up in the family of a school teacher and a nurse, in conditions of severe lack of money. Since childhood, I dreamed of working, earning money and not living in poverty. I entered the institute and at the same time worked at 2-3 jobs, I could already provide for myself. After graduating from the institute, I already made very good money, bought a car, had a very real goal of buying an apartment. Lack of money for me is a nightmare and I climbed up with all my might.
My husband is also from a modest family, but he has a very wealthy businesswoman grandmother, who always provided him with all the "joys of life", bought him an apartment, a car, he works in her business, not straining too much, earns well. Actually, while we did not have children, we lived well: he had his own money, I had mine, he provided household expenses. Literally six months after the wedding, I became pregnant. To be honest, I didn’t want children yet, I thought that I must first achieve all financial goals. But the husband really wanted children and still achieved his goal. As soon as I stopped working, the problems started. Having said that "there is no money", he began to bring home an amount less than my salary was. Only my salary was for me, and with this money we had to live together with the child. For me it was a disaster, again a severe lack of money, I began to count the days until I could go to work. Scandals did not suit, reconciled. The child is a year old, the husband began to beg for a second. I love children and want them, but I am against raising them in poverty. My husband promised a babysitter, a private kindergarten, paid doctors, and double the income he brings home as soon as I get pregnant. I resisted for a long time, but still believed and agreed. And now I'm pregnant again. In the first month, the husband brings the same salary, saying that the term is still short and I have no additional expenses. About the nurse, a kindergarten, paid medicine of the speech any more does not go. The second month has come, my husband declares to me: I thought here, we spend a lot, we don’t need to indulge ourselves, we still need to save money, happiness is not in money. And cuts even the amount that he brought before. He didn’t give me money at all, put it in the nightstand, said to take it only when absolutely necessary and write everything down. Speaking of pampering: I have one sweater for winter and summer for all occasions, sneakers with holes and a jacket that is very many years old. This is my entire wardrobe. As for the beauty salon, my husband also has his own opinion. His mother is a classic "village woman" and he believes that beauty should be natural (up to the point that hair should not be removed from unnecessary places). That is, procedures such as manicures are considered pampering for him, a beautician is generally from the realm of fantasy. For me it's a pain, because I'm a girl, I want to be beautiful, and I dream of the times when I can afford to at least buy a dress. That is, there is no money not only for women's joys, but also for necessity. Well, I'm strong, I can earn money myself. Although pregnant and with a small child, I already know how to do it. But then the question is: how should I treat a husband who does not provide for the family? How can I smile at him, how can I sleep with him, how can I have a good relationship with him? After all, for me in such a situation, a man is not worthy of respect. Will the family fall apart then? Is this the right way to divorce? So what to do? He has money, he just does not consider it necessary to spend it. Otherwise, our relations are good, and he focuses on this: the main thing is that everything is fine with us, and money is not the main thing. He does not understand my need for money, he thinks that “we are not starving, what else do you need?” I would not want to ruin the family, but living in poverty is hell. Especially artificially created. He does not deny himself the joys: beer, chips, sweets, in a restaurant he pays for all his friends to show off, gadgets of the latest models, his grandmother buys crazy clothes, he is well dressed. What do i do? Go to work? Reconcile? What to do and where to run? (((

Svetlana89

Thank you for the article! I absolutely agree that a woman can earn money herself. But this is probably somewhat dishonest: earn money yourself, take care of the children yourself, do household chores yourself too. And then what is the husband for? My, for example, with a child and around the house does not help me at all. In his free time, he rests.

Svetlana89, I agree. Moreover, the husband earns money, he simply does not take into account your needs. Have you tried talking to your husband about this? How does he respond to your arguments? And reminders that it was promised to increase your income and a nanny, etc.?

Svetlana89

Of course, I talked to my husband, I talked a lot. At one time, he can promise three boxes so that I calm down for a while, then not do it, of course. But more often he answers that "happiness is not in money, the main thing is that everything is fine with us, and the rest is the little things in life." Answers to him of this type: a manicure is not necessary - I like it anyway. Get a haircut? Let me cut your hair, why waste money? (he's not a hairdresser, of course) A circus? I will entertain the child myself. Winter boots? Wow, how much do they cost. Let's take a look at Ali. And everything like that.

I don’t even know if he deliberately deceived me with his promises, or if he himself believed that he would increase income, but then changed his mind.

Hello Svetlana89! In order for the spouses in the family to be happy with each other, it is important that they have the same views on life. According to your description, you and your husband have a complete mismatch in their expectations. In his terms, a good wife is a "village woman", as you write, who takes care of the household, her husband and children, and not herself, and does not spend money on manicures and hairdressers. You, in turn, do not agree with him and rely on the fact that you will stay at home and will be able to go to beauty salons and update your fashion wardrobe, because you want to be beautiful and feminine.

If you are completely financially dependent on your husband, then his views on how much and what to spend money on are likely to win - he is the master of the situation in this case. He does not depend on you and acts at his own discretion in accordance with HIS views on how to live correctly. So it makes sense to take this into account - until you have your own sources of income, you will always depend on your husband and his preferences and outlook on life. If he considers beauty salons an unnecessary pampering for his wife, then he will never have money for this.
Do you have leverage over him so that he is forced to consider your views as well? What can you do to make him listen to you?

Svetlana89

Irina Kornilova, thanks for the answer! Yes, it's possible. But why then is he not a village peasant, but a major? We even walk down the street, as if bystanders, a complete discrepancy in appearance.
There used to be levers. He wanted a child, I didn't have enough money. So he promised, even took us on vacation, showed that there is money, only more pregnant. Now there are no levers, I am in a position, there is no turning back. Or I do not see these levers. But in my opinion, now he really is the master of the situation.

Svetlana89, in order to jointly plan the budget, your husband must feel in you an equal partner. And he apparently has a different attitude towards a woman - he is the owner of the house, he makes decisions, and you obey the will of your husband. You don’t need to induce beauty, in his opinion, because you don’t need to attract the attention of men - you already have a husband and a family.
You can become an equal partner when you have the opportunity to live without a husband, to do without him at all. Then you will cease to be dependent and subordinate for him, and he will have to reckon with the fact that you can change your mind that you need just such a husband as he is.
And while you depend on him, he understands that you will not go anywhere in any case and there is no need to listen to your opinion - he can get everything he wants from you, and so, and calmly lead the lifestyle that is close to him spirit. Moreover, you hold on to him and the main thing for you is to save him - "to save the family." So you yourself put yourself in conditions when your husband does not need to compromise and negotiate with you, take into account your tastes and views.

Svetlana89

Irina Kornilova, I understand. How should I deal with him now? While I pretend that everything is in order. He likes it very much. But it's probably wrong. Maybe stop him washing, ironing, cooking? Or do you need something more radical? It's probably funny that I can now leave him somewhere: pregnant, with a child and without money.

Svetlana89, you should not pretend that this situation suits you. Be sure to clarify those points that make your life together uncomfortable for you (or for your husband). The longer you pretend that everything suits you, the more a person gets used to this state of affairs, and then, when your patience runs out and you tell your husband that something does not suit you, it will be difficult for him to understand "why? After all, you are so wonderful life all this time!". And he will be inclined to attribute your dissatisfaction to your whims and mood swings, and is unlikely to take it seriously.

Gently talk to your husband about what you need and what you are lacking. Your husband values ​​his reputation among friends and tends to "show off" by paying for friendly dinners at a restaurant, decorating himself with expensive gadgets, and so on. So it makes sense for you to take into account this trait of his and build your conversation around in the following way, that if you, like his wife, look "poor and unkempt", then his friends will decide that he saves on the family, because he has money not enough - for his "expensive toys" he can scrape them together, but only at the expense of his wife and children.
Of course, it’s not worth it to say directly to him in the forehead - “they will think that you are a miser.” Try not to hurt him or offend him - there should be an opportune moment for such a conversation. The conversation should be about the fact that you care about his image and the image of your family, and not directly about the fact that you have claims against him. What kind of wife, children, home a man has - this is an indicator of his solvency, as a master and as a breadwinner in the eyes of others. So it makes sense for him to think about what his wife wears and so on.

In addition, if you want to update your wardrobe, you can always count on gifts for the holidays - do not forget to voice your desires to your husband so that he is always aware of what to give you for the New Year, March 8, etc.

Review of the consultation

Svetlana89

Irina is an amazing psychologist! She helped solve the problem with her husband, following her recommendations, I realized that I should not hush up the problem, we talked with my husband, he turned out to be an adequate person :) The issue was resolved peacefully. Thank you very much for your advice! If not for you, I would have gone the wrong way.

Every year more and more often you can hear the complaints of women that their husbands refuse to provide for their families. You can still somehow come to terms with the fact that a man earns little. But how to behave in a situation where the duty to support not only yourself and children, but also a healthy adult man fell on your fragile shoulders? And if he still has the audacity not to do housework (cooking, cleaning), but all day long just lies on the couch or has fun at your expense?

First you need to find out the main reasons why men turn from getters into domestic sloths.

Have you ever wondered why a person becomes responsible? Many people think that it is a matter of their own choice. However, this choice is in any case due to certain circumstances. So, if in childhood a child is spoiled too much and does not impose any duties on him, then in the future he will become a selfish consumer with a probability of 90%. On the contrary, when a person from an early age is forced to take care of a younger brother or sister, help mom and dad with the housework, he will grow up responsible and conscientious.

Similar principles apply in family life. Many women, without noticing it, pamper their companions too much and do not require them to perform important duties.

For example, the fair sex saves on her desires (buying new clothes, accessories, attending entertainment events and beauty salons) in order to buy food for the house. But what about the husband? Isn't that his duty too? The fact is that men, to a much lesser extent than women, are inclined to make sacrifices. They do not understand the suffering that their companions experience in trying to get money for a family. All they see is that the fridge is full. So, you don't have to worry about earning money for food yet.

A man becomes responsible when he needs to take care of someone. And provided that he loves those who can be taken care of. Therefore, if a wife builds a successful career, boasts of her high earnings and constantly buys things that are significant for the family, she shows her strength and independence. Why take care of that woman who does a great job on her own?

A woman can also demonstrate the opposite qualities that reduce the motivation of a man to earn money. For example, he behaves too capriciously, constantly demands new gifts, has a tendency to squander, while completely refusing to work. The desire to take care of her is unlikely to arise, because the man simply does not want to be used.

Why does a man refuse to provide for his family

So, the following habits in a woman’s behavior can push a man away from making money for a family:

1. She saves money all the time.
2. Strives to earn a lot of money on her own and demonstrate independence and strength to others (including her husband).
3. Hyperresponsible. She believes that if she cannot provide for her family, then her husband will not replace her.
4. Too capricious and selfish.

If you want your husband to start providing for the family, give up the image of a strong and independent woman. But you shouldn't stoop to the level of a dependent. You must show the man that you are able to earn money for yourself, but providing for the family is his responsibility. You have the right to work, build a career, realize yourself in a profession and creativity. But your income should be spent primarily on yourself. Look after your appearance, go to cafes, buy new clothes regularly, and set aside a small amount of money every month (this will help you feel more confident).

But paying utility bills, buying food, repairing a house are serious expenses that your man should be responsible for. Of course, you can take a financial part in such matters, but you are not required to do so. As a woman, you create comfort in the house, maintain order, and raise children. Your main responsibilities lie in the psychological and creative plane, and the duties of a man - in the financial.

If holes have formed in the family budget, due to which there is no way to buy even normal products for the house, you should not panic, grab your head, deny yourself buying new underwear, get money from your personal “stash” or get a second job. Give your husband the opportunity to solve the problem, be patient. No need to saw it or portray the great martyr. A man himself will perfectly see that a hunger strike has begun in the family. When he realizes that no one will solve the problem for him, he will make active attempts to correct the situation.

Of course, changes in the behavior of a man will not happen too quickly. Sometimes it takes weeks, sometimes whole months. Do not forget to praise a man in those moments when he makes efforts to improve the financial situation of his family. If only demands or even silent expectations come from your side, the man will stop trying.

And now a fly in the ointment. Unfortunately, there are situations when a man refuses to provide for his family for a long time, even when the wife shifts responsibility to him and conscientiously fulfills the role of a good housewife. A man can begin to be capricious, take offense, beg for money from parents and friends, sell joint property, and live on small earnings. This is a vivid example of an infantile and selfish person whose necessary adult qualities were killed in the bud in childhood and cannot be restored. For example, his mother was a strong and strong-willed person who dragged her family on her shoulders and took care of the boy too much.

Living with such a person is very difficult. Sometimes divorce is the best option. But if a man has qualities that you really appreciate (kindness, sense of humor, attentiveness, sensitivity, tenderness), or for some reason you do not want to destroy the family, then form a separate budget. Let everyone pay for himself. If a man impudently refuses to give 50% for an apartment or food, you can move out of him for a while to your parents or to rented housing. Once in real life conditions, a man will be forced to pay at least for himself.

In conclusion, we will give a very important piece of advice. Never sacrifice yourself to a man.

Many couples today do not experience any pleasure from their relationship. Instead of enjoying life, people find out who should pay for what and why one has to earn more...

Psychologist Oleg Silyavsky about the correct roles of a man and a woman, the immutability of human nature and why paying 40 sheep for a lady is right!

"Where is the justice?" ask the male miners. “Real heroes have long since disappeared,” complain the fair sex. Onliner.by correspondents talked with Oleg Silyavsky, coach, psychologist trainer, teacher of the true essence, director of the Praktikum consulting company, about the correct roles of a man and a woman, the immutability of human nature, and why paying 40 sheep for a lady is right.

What should ideally be the roles of men and women?

— In my trainings, I often invite people to present a simple biological model. For example, there is a house on the edge of the forest, a man, a woman and five children live in it - as it used to be. And from this follow all the roles, functions, consequences, who should treat whom, who should do what. Yes, everything has changed in material and social terms: people live in comfortable apartments, there is no need to cut wood, carry firewood. But at the same time, the archetypal nature of man remained the same. If people do not follow it, then problems begin, certain defects: psychological, social.

In general, in the modern world there is a clear distortion of the roles of men and women, it's like giving a drink. Painfully, people have come off their true nature, they do what they want. Men forget their roles and functions, women lose theirs... In this sense, it is really a complete mess now.

- If you follow your model, then it turns out that a man should fully provide for a woman?

“Of course I should. Definitely. Otherwise, he loses his masculine essence and degenerates. There is such a thing as a spiritual path, and everyone follows it, whether he knows about it or not. If a man does not realize his true biological function, then his path, his psyche are distorted. The same with a woman.

But does a man owe a woman anything?

- If he is a man, then he first of all owes himself, his masculine nature and his spiritual path. The duty of a man, his natural nature, is to be a warrior, a protector, a patron. And if he doesn't, then he's not a man. Of course, a person can do otherwise. He really doesn't owe anyone anything. But then let him accept the consequences of what he does, that he does not fulfill his specific destiny. And the consequences will be sad - for both men and women who do not want to go the natural way.

- What are the consequences?

- For a man, this is the destruction of a business, the loss of the meaning of life, depression, alcoholism, impotence. There are a lot of options that nature has prepared. In women, violation of their nature and the right spiritual path lead to loss of beauty, weight gain, female cancer.

At first, it all seems like fun, especially at a young age. We have not yet caught up with these consequences ... Here in Hinduism and Buddhism such a concept as karma is confessed. This beautiful law is actually the law of karma, or, as it is also called, the law of universal justice. But even if we remove the mystical side of the issue, the law of karma really exists. And here it is not even necessary to bring all these Buddhist stories about reincarnation. The law of universal justice works already in this life. The essence of this law is very simple: the choices we made yesterday determine our lives today, the choices we make today will determine our lives tomorrow. Therefore, those people who today make a choice against their true nature, at first can enjoy, get a lot of pleasure. It seems to them that they have got rid of unnecessary obligations: to provide for a woman, support a family, or - for a woman - to serve a man, maintain a hearth, raise children. But a person can rejoice for a year, two, three, and in five it will catch up with him. And in eight, it will catch up with him so much that he will not find it a little. I have been practicing for twenty years and have seen so many destinies! It really works like clockwork, and people don't even know it. They think: this is the world, you know, do what you want in it. And it's not as simple as it seems.

“So, what is the true path of a real man?”

“He has to have a Cause first. For a man, it plays a fundamentally important role. If he has no business, then this, consider, is not a man. It would be wrong to say "profession" here. Is businessman a profession? Or an artist?

Again, in a simple biological model, the head of the family must go hunting every day or plow the land. Then he survives, his family survives. Therefore, the main male path, spiritual development is connected just the same with business. This is the first priority.

And the second priority is a woman. Because a man needs to get rid of the fruits of his work, how to say it. If a man does not have a loving woman, then complete nonsense begins in his life. For example, he begins to reinvest the fruits of his labor. So do many businessmen who have a mess with relationships. That is, he did one business, received a lot of money. Where to put them? We need to invest in our next business. Invest in the next one. And now where to put them? After all, if a man is successful, he created one business, he will do two, and ten. I thought of getting rid of the attendants, but there were twice as many of them. It is necessary to do the third business! He will be bent like that, he will live his whole life in these businesses, and then at the age of 70 he will find that everything has passed by. There was success, but there was no happiness, and there isn’t, he built his entire career, he did something else.

Therefore, every man should ideally have a woman who would blow his money down the drain.

- Right into the wind?

- Yes exactly. Women spend money down the drain, it's obvious. But first, a man needs to earn. And this has always been indicated in traditional cultures. Unfortunately, in the modern world, most of the traditional practices have been lost. But in some places such cultures still remain. For example, in the East, such a phenomenon as kalym is still preserved. And rightly so, I tell you. This is very correct. Because if you can't pay 40 sheep, you can't trust a woman.

- And if a woman does not want you to pay 40 rams for her?

- And they have no such concept that a woman does not want. It's a different upbringing. And the man is also sure: if he paid 40 rams, he knows for sure that the woman wants him, and the children, and the kitchen. I saw it all with my own eyes.

- And the man, perhaps, enjoys the fact that the woman lowers his money?

- Of course, it's obvious. The ideal family is a family in which the woman does not know where the money comes from, and the man does not know where it goes. In terms of money, this is an excellent example of a couple. A woman always has a lot of wonderful ways to spend money.

A man, on the other hand, does not know how to spend cash just like that, he always thinks, thinks about how best to invest. Strives to ensure that there is always a return on invested capital. A woman spends easily. I bought a ring for 9 thousand dollars, for example. And this is still a small one, it is necessary for 25, so that there is a bigger diamond. Once - and 25 thousand are gone, they flew into the wind.

Money in this case is the continuation and embodiment of male love. Gifts, flowers, houses, cars, coats and specifically cash. If a man loves, then he gives all this to a woman.

- And why else does a man need a woman, except to spend money?

- In general, a woman for a man is one of the best sources of investment. Provided, of course, that this is a real woman. He puts something into her all the time, and she always gets something. Once he invested something, the children turned out, another time he invested, the house turned out. On a material level, this is important.

At the social level - the status, they say, I have a woman, and the best and most beautiful. In addition, it gives a sense of a reliable rear.

But what about on a spiritual level? This is also very important. On a spiritual level, a woman helps a man in one very important matter - in search of truth. Men, on the other hand, are always looking for the truth, everything is itching for them. Is that why there are so many men in science, among Nobel Prize winners, for example? Because they have this feature: they want to know how the world works, they want to find the truth. Scientists, religious figures, even politicians, in some way, want to know how this world works in order to command them. This is fundamentally important for a man - the truth. And most importantly, the truth about yourself. Find out who I am in this world. And it is a woman who can tell. It says directly in words who you are. Goat, for example. And if you're lucky, he says: "You are my hero." And that's it, the man immediately enlightenment comes. Only a real woman can give a man the true image he is looking for. And to give it exactly in the vein in which he needs it: I am a hero, I am a winner, I am the best in this world, because such a woman loves me, and she tells me about it.

“Still, a lot has changed. Previously, gentlemen got up when a lady entered the room, but now it is not customary to give a girl a seat on public transport.

“The fact is that the classes have shifted a lot. Who were real men in Rus'? Mostly officers, nobles. Like Tsvetaeva: “with one fierce will you took the heart and the rock” ... And they behaved accordingly. But they were really men!

And then in Rus' almost all the men were destroyed. For about a hundred years there was a total genocide of the male population. See. The First World War, then the October Revolution and the Civil War - the destruction of the entire color of the White Guard, the nobility. Those who were not killed were expelled from the territory of Russia. But these were the best men not only in Russia - in the world in general! Further. Dekulakization - the destruction of men in the village. Those who really could do something, create a product, keep a household. Then, through Stalin's purges, they destroyed the red commanders, the thinking intelligentsia, and in general all capable people. The Patriotic War is finishing off all the rest who were heroes and went to defend their homeland.

As a result, our women were left with no one. Well, if there was one man in the village after the war. Women are used to having to do everything themselves. It's like in the post-war proverb: "I am a horse, I am a bull, I am both a woman and a man." After that, the next generations are brought up in a distorted field: boys - in an infantile female key (there are no men around), and girls - like draft horses. And then this script is passed down from generation to generation. And he is still active. Our women strive to be independent. I recently read this on Facebook. How to find a real Russian woman? Three step method. Set fire to the hut, disperse the horse, wait. [Laughs - approx. Onliner.by.]

The Russian woman still strives to grab everything herself. "Can I bring you bags?" "No, no, I'm on my own." And it's okay that the man left, she will earn money herself, she will raise the children herself. And she thinks she should be applauded for it. Before, yes, when there was no other choice, it was heroism. And now the situation is different, there are a lot of men. And here it is necessary not to applaud, but to throw tomatoes at her for ruining the lives of children, because these boys, brought up without a father, do not know what a real man should be, and girls do not know how to deal with the opposite sex. Vicious circle. She should not applaud, but say: “Listen, you, sick, get rid of your idiotic scenario, attract a normal man into your life. You don't need to work three jobs and raise children. Learn to be a woman, learn to submit, obey, idolize a man, admire him, and everything will be all right with you.

- That is, a woman does not need to build a career at all, but should only be engaged in borscht?

- A woman can not build a career. This is not a woman's way of life. And women can't work. The female body is simply not designed for stress. Well, let's see. Let's take this box that you have in the editorial office, and walk 20 times with it along the corridor. First me, then you. See what will happen.

Well, the female body is not designed for workloads. A real lady should not work, she should have an occupation, and a favorite one. If it will bring her a good profit, I will only be for it. [Laughs - approx. Onliner.by.] But if it is not profitable, it does not matter. A woman should not earn!

I'm not talking about the fact that a woman cannot receive money or other dividends - fame, respect, recognition - at the expense of social merit. Please, for God's sake, let him do whatever he wants. The main thing is that it does not become a job for her. Because only men really know how to work and can. And women are not made for this. Their body and psyche are imprisoned for a completely different occupation. First of all, it is borscht, you rightly said. Just don't be so skeptical about it. Borscht is a great thing. But here you need to look wider. Not only borscht. It's like saying that a man is designed only under the hammer. Only narrow-minded cynics say so, both from the side of men and from the side of women. Everyone has their own greatest role in this world. Borscht and a hammer are only the tools of this greatest role. The most important functions of a woman, which includes borscht, are femininity and motherhood in the broadest sense. First you have to be a woman, and then, if she is able to attract and keep a man, start a family, it will come to motherhood. And if she is bad as a woman, then she will not become a good mother. And femininity is, first of all, beauty, the one that will save the world. In other words, a woman has two main functions: beauty and care, femininity and motherhood. By the way, they can also build some kind of business. Women are best suited for careers that are related to these areas. For example, the modeling business. Or a restaurant, all sorts of clubs - where you need to take care of customers. And when women start managing factories... For this, I would say what you need to have, but I won’t be with you. The woman doesn't have it.

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